


Why Me?

by Unicornsfartglitter



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst, Ass stuffing, Biting, Blood licking, Blow Jobs, Bottom Negan, Butt Plugs, Dildos, Enemies to Lovers, Hate Sex, Hormonal Negan, M/M, Mention of non descriptive rape, Mpreg, Negan not raped, Panic Attacks, Past Childhood Abuse, Rimming, Rough Sex, Sex Toys, Spanking, Top Rick Grimes, Vomiting, cursing, hurt Negan, mention of abortion, mpreg Negan
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-24
Updated: 2020-05-03
Packaged: 2021-02-26 03:27:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 20
Words: 42,892
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21926686
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Unicornsfartglitter/pseuds/Unicornsfartglitter
Summary: After hate sex with Rick, Negan finds himself the first man pregnant. Control is a thing Negan is going to have to learn to give up when he finds out that Rick is a total freak in the sheets.
Relationships: Fat Joey/Daryl Dixon, Negan/Rick Grimes
Comments: 225
Kudos: 206





	1. Lust

**Author's Note:**

> I will be posting one chapter every Sunday until I’m caught up. I hope to finish it but I started this over a year ago and haven’t touched it in awhile up until today. Hopefully posting it will light a fire under my ass.

Be a doll and hold Lucille, be gentle with her because she likes it sweet.” Negan handed Lucille over to Rick smirking in satisfaction.

It had been three months since Negan rolled in, ordering them around after murdering Abraham and Glenn. Ever since that first visit Rick had been subjected to holding the murder weapon as Negan danced around like a showman.

Like every other visit Negan took eighty percent that he called fifty percent. Any valuable medication was taken and their community had to scavenge out further and further to sustain themselves. As their elderly got frailer Negan's people thrived staring at his starving community without a care to their baggy clothing.

Going house to house as usual Negan was pleased that no supplies were hidden. That's how they ended up in the community panty with Negan adamant that he needed one more can of corn. Rick's jaw clenched, Lucille heavy in his hand as he watched Negan look over food he already inspected. Rick's breath tightened, vision red at the edges. He could do it now, kill the bastard consequences be damned.

He looked over at Rick, seeing rising anger fighting to be contained and like every occurrence of this situation a thrill ran down his spine. Rick was a sexy beast but that video of him primal and bearded showed that when he was boiling over it was the best. “Ricky pricky.”

Rick looked at him now, tapped out of his furious rage, he wanted to charge him, beat him until he was bloody and broken. Instead he cocked his head staring with quiet contempt.

Negan laughed and stalked over, gliding his hand as close to his crotch as he could get away with and retrieved his bat. Rick said nothing as he skimmed his hands over his to take back his weapon. “I think it's time we stop fighting this.”

Rick stared on furiously so Negan juggled the can of corn in hand and smiled all teeth, throwing it at the window, relishing at the sound of breaking glass but other than clenched fists and closed eyes the other showed no reaction. 

“I could do this all day, take out all your windows just in time for winter.”

Swallowing thickly Rick's jaw constricted tighter and he looked at the broken window. “What do you want?”

“Your attention.” Negan walked to him then cupping Rick's stubbled chin amazed he still saw blue piercing through annoyed black pupils.

Rick was stark still when he pulled him to him, kissing with all the darkness between them. When he ran a hand across a clothed chest, nipping at a stubborn bottom lip that anger finally arrived. Lips opening, Negan delved in only to have Rick shove his tongue in his mouth and take over control. 

Negan didn't even know he was being pushed back until he hit metal shelving hard, rounded screws digging in. “You never shut up.” Rick snapped. His body was pulled forwards only to be slammed back.

“Tell me how you really feel.” At Negan's sass Rick let out a grunt and claimed his mouth again. It was a haze, being undressed by Rick, him turning hard watching Rick's expose his thick cock. His ass was a delicious sight that Negan spent too many nights imagining ravishing in every way possible.

Rick bent down pulling out a small bottle of lube. Of course the boyscout always came prepared. He let out a low chuckle at the convenience , it appeared Rick was going for one of his common fantasies, fingering himself wide open. The sheen of lube glistened plentifully on Rick's fingers.

Air forced its way out of Negan's lungs in shock. Rick turned him around in record speed, his head knocking against cans and he yelped when a wet digit plunged straight into his walls.

“Shut up, you wouldn't want your Saviors to hear you and come running to see me taking your ass.”

Negan went to yelp again when another finger prodded in deeply but a palm covered his mouth. “Shh.” Rick ordered calmly then pushed his ass out and scissored him wide. The pain was searing, he had never had sex with a man but was making an exception for Rick but now he was being split open by speedy fingers. 

“Take what I give you Negan.” Rick's tone was domineering.

Negan winced when a third digit pushed in and all three worked hard and thrusting. The painful stretch got easier as his ass squelched with too much lube, his sphincter slowly accommodating the girth of Rick's intrusion. He howled when they rubbed aggressively against something, his neglected length dripping precum that he knew was landing on the cool, white concrete. “Don't you think you should be the one bent over?”

The only reply he got was shoving into shelves and fingers withdrawing from his ass. “We can leave right now Negan, like nothing happened. Your call but if you're staying this is how it goes.” 

His short hair was yanked on, Rick's hard cock nudging at his slick ass waiting for a protest. When Rick heard nothing else said he grabbed the base of his dick and pushed his tip in. He hated this man, he took Abraham, worse he took Glenn but he wasn't a savage. Negan would be sore tomorrow, bruised and marked but he felt how tight his rim was when he plunged his fingers in so he took time to open him up.

Negan moaned softly at Rick pushing in slowly, his walls took him in inch by inch. He felt a warm caress to the dip of his back as Rick took him in fully. There was a short pause then pinching to both sides of his hips and he grunted when Rick pulled all but his tip out and shoved back in. The first few pumps stung like a burning flame, buzzing at Rick's largeness but then a graze to his prostate made him howl in delight.

“Shut up!” Rick covered his mouth while pulling his hair and he was spread wider, Rick's dick piercing him deeper at the change in angle. If anything the hair pulling made him twitch and leak non stop, wanting to beg for more. His answer came in the form of deeper thrusts and he cried out wten Rick took him in hand and stroked him roughly. “I hate you, you piece of shit.”

Rick's words didn't hurt, they did nothing but he could feel the ache inside his walls. He was sure they were red and puffy. Rick started to push in, his whole dick breaching him fully then slipping out. The stretch to his hole was unbearable until fingers swiped at his slit and tugged him gently while his ass was pumped into faster. “This is where you really belong, with my dick in you. I should have you on your knees.”

Negan knew he was about to come at Rick's filthy mouth but he was still in charge. “You're full of shit but keep telling yourself that.”

His head banged on metal, a hand squeezed his ass and the other pinched his stomach as Rick pushed up, jostling in him widely and he groaned when hot seed filled his hole. “Damn prick, be gentle with the goods.”

Rick took his cock then and stroked hard, nails digging into his shaft and teeth breaking into the skin of his neck causing blood to seep out. When a wet tongue lapped across red Negan came realizing Rick was fucking crazy.

Negan was woozy and spent, turning around slowly to see Rick already dressed. A rag was thrown his way and the Alexandrian pointed to his cum splattered across the shelves. “Get dressed and clean that shit up.”

Negan stumbled, following the orders and with boxers on he could feel cum draining out but still swore there was so much latching onto his walls, there couldn't be much sticking there so it had to be his imagination, nerves from his new experience.

Rick met him outside holding his can of corn discussing things casually. His men came up, ready to go and Rick leaned in making a show of sniffing him. “Don't wash.” He ordered. 

Yeah, Rick Grimes was fucking crazy.


	2. What Lust Gets You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IDK if this is worth it. 😞

When Negan got home he washed down, scrubbing all of Rick off him. Who was Rick to make orders? He woke up sore the next day, his whole ass and legs hurt and he swallowed down Tylenol. Rick was on his mind a lot, how he plowed into him. What a sniveling but respectable guy he was. Negan killed Spencer to defend his honor and he was only judged. Fuck Rick with his pretty curls and gorgeous eyes and definitely fuck that nice dick of his.

A week came too soon and it was fun time. Mattresses had been burned, inventoried knives fake lost in a game to see Rick sweat. Negan wanted one more can of green beans and none were available. There had to be a needless, pretty chore for Rick today.

That steely gaze was right at the gate waiting. It was all business gathering supplies and house checking. Rick held Lucille, gave him the stink eye and not one word was mentioned of their rendezvous.“Let's check your knife inventory, make sure your only protection is accounted for.”

Rick rolled his eyes, too slow to be trying to hide his annoyance. “Let's not since it was your idea in the first place and I got stuff to do.”

“And thangs?” Negan joked in a southern drawl.

“Cut the shit Negan.” 

The back talking was too much and Negan leaned over, grabbing Lucille in slow motion. He let the sharp bat rub at Rick's jeans right at his dick. “Don't forget who I am. What I'm capable of. How's Carl by the way?”

Rick gulped. “Do you want to check the inventory?” It was a whiny beg to change the subject but he let it go, Rick did fuck him good after all.

“Sure honey bunches let's do that now.”

Negan took hours checking the knives, claiming false counts just to see Rick squirm and when they were alone counting Rick's at his own house he leaned in. “Not happening.” Rick cut him off mid cuddle.

“Aww come on Ricky is there a difference between once, twice, twenty times?”

“Do you want me to fuck your stupid ass again already? It's the only way you're getting it and I'm sure it's sore if my choked dick has a say in it.”

That filthy mouth was at it again and if it was speaking that way for anything other than sex it would be a problem.“Hmm maybe next time sugar lips.”

When Negan left he made sure to stare back through his rear view mirror, taking in Rick's resting bitch face. It was a sexy thing indeed.

\------------—————————————-

Over a month passed and Negan had tried everything to get Rick into bed. Even when he fingered himself open prepared for the next day he was turned down. Rick wouldn't even top for him and none of the wives did it for him. Not many objected when he asked for brutality in the bedroom but no spank, dick slap, or dirty talk was enough. Handcuffs and blindfolds either and he decided Rick was that mountain top that no one could reach or rather breach.

Jerking off was the easiest solution but even when he pinched himself, fingered his hole, and eventually decided to shop secretly for a dildo exactly like he remembered Rick's dick being it still wouldn't do. His dick and ass yearned for Rick and he wanted it as rough as possible.

It was another two days until he got to see Rick's constipated face again. Today he would check on the posts at The Sanctuary and ensure everything was running fine. Negan had eaten breakfast and checked on the third post of the day when he felt it again. That queasy feeling that had been happening off and on all week. Some Saviors had the flu and were quarantined and he waited to get more symptoms but he felt better these last few days.

Negan leaned over, throwing up his breakfast, sweat coating his suddenly flushed skin. His head felt a tad funny and suddenly he didn't feel good at all. Simon ran over and sat him on the ground convincing him he looked like death and when he was given a water he sipped it slow but it felt so good quenching his thirst.

Dr. Carson ran his vitals, he sat on an exam table sighing as Simon towered over him like a watchdog. He tried to convince his friend he was fine but here he was. Dr. Carson looked at him then at his chart then looked back to him. “Tell me I got the fucking flu already.”

Dr. Carson scrunched up his face, an unfamiliar look adorning his features. “Let's do an ultrasound. A routine check.”

Negan growled then. “Routine for the flu?”

Dr. Carson pulled the machine over. “I don't think you have the flu.”

Grimacing at incompetence Negan crossed his arms. “I don't pay you to think.” Really Negan didn't pay him at all except for in safety.

“Negan it's okay. We will know soon enough what's going on. Please take your shirt off.”

Peeling off his shirt he muttered. “I don't usually put out on the first date unless it's surf and turf.”

Cool gel chilled his stomach, lathered by gloved hands. It didn't look right having an ultrasound in that area. “Oh God I have cancer.” He spat out thinking it would be ironic to join his sweet angel the same way she went out. She was better than him and he deserved this more.

“It's not cancer.”

That wasn't reassurance, Negan had rich friends pre apocalypse. Doctors and he knew they did a good job, not negligence like this joker. The machine rolled around and Dr. Carson paused over a big circle with a dot inside. “Damn I have cancer.”

No one spoke, a pin could drop and be heard in an echo. Simon's face would be priceless in it’s stupidity if Dr. Carson didn't zoom in his ugly mug right up to the screen. “Just tell me I'm going to die doc.”

He couldn't breath, the room too small and it brought him back from a full blown panic attack when Simon's confused voice spoke. “It's a baby Negan.”

Negan looked at the screen, Dr. Carson still pulled into it. Banging his firsts on the table he screamed. “Dr. Carson!” 

The Doctor faced him then adjusting his glasses on his nose and looking at the machine one more time. “I don't know how to explain it Negan but it's true.”

Staring at both men he waited for the punchline, this wasn't real but Dr. Carson and Simon both looked serious. “No, there's no way.”

“Nausea with vomiting and headaches is one thing but constipation and cramping is another. Classic signs of pregnancy and look at that.”

Negan looked down at where the Doctor was pointing, his stomach. There was a small, fat layer of skin across his stomach but he hadn't noticed it until then. “It's not possible.”

“Walkers are eating us, we're all infected. Anything is possible.” Dr. Carson said with too mournful an acceptance.

Negan wouldn't cry but he really didn't know what to do.


	3. A Reveal

It was too early after his news to be visiting Rick but it was pickup day and rules were there for a reason. He didn't want to get out of bed, he was the man in charge and who would take him seriously knowing he was pregnant? That it could only be the byproduct of a good ‘ole fucking.

He demanded an abortion but Dr. Carson told him it was risky, he could die too. Other then popping a lot of pills what was he going to do? Shove a hanger up his ass and hope for the best? Negan suggested being cut open but with all his muscles Dr. Carson was going to need time practicing on cadavers even for a cesarean so this was his life.

Rick wasn't at the gate, it looked pretty sparse truthfully. Rosita stood there arms crossed like her cheery group didn't murder his outpost first.“Hey my spicy tamale.” 

At the mean look he got Aaron cut in. “Our walls weak in the back. Some walkers pushed through last night and we're trying to patch it up.” 

This wouldn't do, grabbing Aaron by the arm he pushed him in front of him. “Lead the way.”

Rick was drenched in sweat despite the ball freezing cold. A group was nailing up sheet metal and communicating like a team. He grabbed Rick's shoulder roughly as he was bent over still faced away from him. He expected a bitchy scream not for Rick to shrug him off and turn around. 

“This is definitely disappointing, you are supposed to report to our nearest post when you need help, not do it yourself. That's what we're here for.”

“Sure it's not to take our shit?” It wasn't sneering or loud, it was said plainly in truth, an even tone for no one else's ears.

Leaning in, raking over Rick's t shirt that clung to show off each muscle underneath Negan purred in his ear. “Let's fix this shit.”

Other Saviors were called in and in three hours the wall was patched up, better than before. They were all hungry working through what would have been lunch time. Carol pulled out a grill when they announced they were almost done. Negan had his own streak of sweat glistening off despite the cold sun but kept on his jacket, he was cold natured.

Rick was high fiving his family, a pretty grin exposing his crow's feet. He even went as far as to nod to all the Saviors who helped. Rick had a nice smile with pearly whites that he rarely showed off but he was in a good mood today.

Cooking meat hit his nostrils, it smelled putrid and he had no chance to run off before puking on the road, everyone stared and the smell got worse, filling his nostrils and churning his stomach. His stomach constricted in pain and he expelled once more before holding himself and running to the nearest house.

Of course it was fucking Rick's house, a photo of Rick and he assumed Lori on the wall, running he dropped down at the toilet bowl and released his sick until it felt he had nothing left. He was damn tired, stomach cramping and couldn't help but imagine popping out a ten pound baby. Lucille wanted one but then she got sick, he did her wrong. Is that why he was going through this? Some sick punishment and he knew he would be a sucky dad. What could he teach in life lessons? How to kill? How to hurt and lie and cheat? He cried right there in Rick's perfectly clean bathroom. Tears over the unknown, at Lucille's loss, that he never had the chance to properly grieve and over this stupid world and its stupid bullshit. 

He pulled his jacket tighter to him, leaned on the wall with no desire to get up after crying until his lungs stretched. A soft knock interrupted his self deprecating thoughts. “Negan?” 

He laughed at it being him of all people checking on him but it was his house. An irrational part of him thought if he stayed mute Rick would leave. 

“Are you okay?” 

He was pretty far from it and the question made him cry some more. “Okay I'm coming in.” Of course he didn't lock the door. 

Rick heard Negan cry for twenty straight minutes then calm down to sniffles then nothing and everyone had bad days, weeks now with the things they saw but Negan was different, a tyrant and he contemplated letting the ass be, he deserved misery and crying wasn't enough justice. He was mystified when Negan cried again at his small concerned question, it wasn't even that sincere.

He didn't expect to see the leathered man sitting there on the floor, legs spread out, snotty toilet tissue sprawled everywhere. It was sad and he wanted to rejoice in his pain but he couldn't. Negan looked up then, red eyed and grief stricken. “Like what you see? Your fucking enemy crying on the floor?”

“No Negan.” He was being honest, no scenario imagined could compare to the truth of Negan's hurt because he looked lost and Rick didn't like it. “You can tell me what's wrong.”

Negan closed his eyes, inhaled deeply and put a hand on his stomach. Rick noticed it was protruding slightly but they were starving his community so it made sense The Saviors were eating well. “You can't help me, this is your fucking fault.”

Rick stared at him like he had grown two heads. Everything was always his fault. When Alexandria stumbled, when Carl was angry, and when Lori didn't get her way. Negan blaming him for anything other than the death of Glenn and Abraham or for Alexandria's supply issues was new though. “I didn't make you run crying here and I didn't make you puke in front of an audience.”

Negan hummed, eyes not opening. Leaning back content after an outburst with no scowl or menacing grin, Negan looked almost human, serene and sweet but it was a lie. The thought of stabbing him entered his mind again and it would feel so good stabbing that knife into his gut, feeling his warm blood flow out. Negan leaned over and sighed, scrubbing hands over a short trimmed beard. “You knocked me up, put a bun in my oven. You're the ultimate baby maker.”

Rick peered at Negan who looked unimpressed and had already leaned back again. He waited for the vulgar words, Negan's joke to continue or a reasoning behind it. Instead there was silence. “What?” He asked unintelligently.

Negan didn't open his eyes but moved to push into his pocket and pulled something out, it was blindly thrown in his lap and he saw it. An ultrasound photo.

“Seven weeks. Congratulations on super semen. It can impregnate a man!” Exaggerated jazz hands shook with no joy.

“Where the hell did you find this Negan? This is a sick joke even for you.”

Negan snatched the picture and stared at it. “Only it's not a fucking joke. Why come up with stupid shit like that? It's too off the wall to even be funny. I don't know whether to burn it or to...to...damn it I don't even know! I'm stuck with this.” 

Rick saw aggravation as Negan pulled up his shirt. Rick knew that women didn't show this early but Negan definitely had a patch of thick fat across his stomach. It was almost like a pad and other than that he looked the same. Maybe it was some added protection, he didn't know because a male pregnancy didn't have any symptoms because it didn't exist. Rick went to touch the lining and Negan snapped. “Don't you fucking touch me you prick!”

Tears started back and Rick pinched himself, it hurt. Affirming that he wasn't in a twilight zone as Negan gasped for air and cried, it was disgusting. “Calm down, it's not good for the baby to be stressed.”

“What the fuck? You would love that. Me miscarrying, bleeding out on your damn clean bathroom tiles. Kill two birds with one stone.”

The man was hormonal and worse, scared. “Negan.” Rick took his hand, holding on when Negan tried to let him go. “Hey, it's okay. This is weird but I'm not wishing for this to go south. There has to be a reason for this and you love Judith. Children are miracles, good things and maybe you are in need of a good thing.”

Negan squeezed his hand, finally turned to him red eyed and puffy, Rick could see the ugly bags under his eyes now. “I'm scared.”

“I know you are but you're not alone. We're going to do this together and look at us two, we're hot as hell. He or she is going to be a looker.”

It was stupid but Rick seemed serious, maybe a little excited and Negan had everything or nothing to lose. “Yeah blue eyes we will be beating the potential suitors down in fifteen years.” Negan hardly had the energy to say it but as he spoke he could almost imagine a boy and then girl teenaged and innocent in a walker free world.

Rick and Negan sat there for who knows how long. Negan straddled the line of comfortable silence and agitated thoughts and each time he struggled to breath Rick calmed him. The sound of his family had Rick standing and helping the other up who stumbled in his first steps. Rick could imagine he hadn't slept since his news and there was no train of thought as it slipped out. “Sleep here.” He could see denial on his lips but he cut him off. “Just rest Negan.”

Carl stuck his head out the hallway to see his dad follow the enemy upstairs. Negan sat down heavily on the bed and started to feel bad. “You okay? You look pale.” Struggling for words he laid back and groaned.

“I just feel like shit and don't know what to expect.” Negan admitted. He jerked when a throw blanket was laid over his weary body. “Just rest Negan.” He couldn't object to that and was asleep before Rick left the room.


	4. This Could Work

Bacon cooking woke Negan wide awake and it smelled terrible, throwing his cover back he ran to the bathroom and vomited. He gagged, his stomach empty but irritated and he hugged the toilet. It was starting to feel like it was a good idea to stay chained to it. His body ached, he was cold and he didn't even know if this was morning sickness or if he just happened to he sick. He heard the door knocking but couldn't bother answering. 

Rick didn't sleep all night too concerned. He knew Judith wasn't his and with all the violence and enemies he never imagined having another child as his. He couldn't fathom having a child with Negan, he would probably use the baby as a bargaining chip and his family would never understand how he slept with Negan to begin with but still there was no other option and Negan seemed more a mess than concerned with emotional blackmail.

Knowing Negan needed breakfast he went upstairs ignoring his families judging eyes at the unwanted guest upstairs. When there was no knock he walked in and saw Negan leaning over a toilet. “Hey.”

Negan didn't answer and he heard a low rumbling echo in the toilet bowl. “Just kill me.” Negan moaned out before gagging on air. Approaching him he went to pat his back and thought better of it until shiny, sad eyes looked up. He went to his knees and rubbed Negan's back and saw him arch into him. He was cold to the touch and Rick knew about him but Negan was a germaphobe, he was shocked at Negan's head hitting the toilet seat with no disgust. 

“It's just morning sickness, probably a little different with your...body.” All bets on fear of germs was off because Negan's hands gripped the toilet, he stared ahead and then he shook. “I can't do this! I can't fucking have a baby! I just...I can't.” A flood of tears left Negan trembling and staring at his own vomit in sad fascination.

“Negan.”

The man shook more and sighing Rick stood and turned on the shower. He pulled Negan up and gave him a hug that should have been more awkward. “Let's get you in the shower.”

Negan's arms hung limp at his side and he looked pitiful only gaining his previous menacing glare when Rick went to take his jeans off. “Really Negan? I've already seen it all.” 

That made him deflate again and Rick stripped him down and himself, pulling him into the shower. Goosebumps rose and disappeared as the hot stream hit Negan's flesh.

Saying Negan was beautiful was an understatement, he had a glow and his stomach was just a little round. Soaping up a loofah he scrubbed Negan's back and heard a moan, it was throaty and tired. Rick took his time thoroughly washing Negan’s backside before turning him around. He could feel Negan's eyes on him as he washed his legs and feet and they locked eyes as he washed his chest.

It was a solid stare, no charm or angst as he rubbed the loofah in small circles but Negan gasped when he touched his stomach. That was his child growing in an enemy but the urge was too strong so he took his other hand and touched a wet stomach, it glided along and Negan's nipples started to pebble.

“Like that?”

Rick didn't understand what he was doing, it wasn't a taunt and he didn't really want Negan to get off but still he rubbed at his muscled stomach. A breathy moan escaped hushed lips and Negan leaned into him. Negan's dick was hard and heavy, poking into his leg. He caressed his wet hair and then Negan whined.

“Stop. We can't do this.”

He was the devil but in that moment he was a sad, pathetic thing. Negan breathed heavily and leaned on the wall.

“It's not like I can knock you up.”

Negan was unamused and turned off the shower, grabbing his towel with too much force. “I'm glad you think this or fucking funny. You get to stand there all high and mighty and I get to pop our baby out. Get fat while you stay a skinny assed prick!”

It may have been screamed out but there were water works again and Rick studied him realizing he may not be too far along but one thing for sure he was already on a hormonal high.

“How far along are you again?”

Negan wiped a tear and he wasn't as stealthy as he believed he was.

“Dr. Carson can only guess. He wasn't an OB and I'm a freak so he's guessing seven weeks.”

Nodding Rick opened the bedroom door. Negan nearly nose dived into the bed. It was almost cute seeing him nestle into the sheets.

Rick trudged downstairs and made Negan a plate. scrambled eggs, cut potatoes, and bacon. He Decided on some bottled water and ignored his image in the mirror adoring the wall up the stairs, he almost fucked Negan again.

Watching Negan sleep peacefully Rick had a fleeting image of beating him to death, it would be so easy. Instead he pushed a sleeping shoulder. “Eat.”

Negan groaned and took the plate. He didn't look happy but stabbed some eggs with a fork. It seemed all was well until Negan practically threw the plate on the bed and gagged. Thanks to quick reflexes Negan got the trash can and puked some more.

“Meat.” Negan explained.

An inappropriate joke was at the tip of Rick’s tongue but Negan leaned heavily into the trash can. Rick thought he wasn't done but the gagging had stopped.

“Negan?”

There was no answer.

“Negan are you okay?”

Negan shook his head no and put the waste basket down. For a sick man he moved quick and turned his back to Rick.

“Great.” Negan thought when the door closed. Rick left him and that was a good idea, he was a fucking mess. Crying and puking was all he did, now he wanted to cry more and why not? He was alone, served him right. He was a selfish asshole after all. Instead, he closed his eyes, sleep was a better idea for his pity party.

The door opened again after a while and Negan kept his eyes closed. It didn't matter who it was, maybe he was going to be murdered or maybe Carl knew the truth and wanted to see the freak. The bed dipped but he still refused to open his eyes. He heard a clank and an exhale, he knew that breathing anywhere.

“Hey Negan. I'm just going to put this under your shirt.”

Negan opened his eyes and saw blue piercing through him with kindness, a tad of concern as warm heat hit his skin.

“Hot water bottle. It helped with Lori.”

The contact did help ease the pain and Rick turned then and greeted him again with a bowl.

“Let it melt in your mouth.”

It was ice chips and Rick hand fed him as he stayed still on his side. The man looked sweet, acting like a doting husband. He wasn't inconvenienced by taking care of him and Negan wondered if he could be that kind of man if he had another wife he loved. Probably not, he used Lucille up.

“Was she an angel? Your perfect wife?” Negan was sure Lori was cookie cutter perfect.

Gears turned, reminiscing of a different time, Rick grinned and yeah, they were surely a white picket fences kind of happy couple.

“No. If walkers didn't come we would have divorced. She was probably cheating on me with Shane before my coma, my best friend. Judith's biological dad.”

Negan didn't see that one coming.

“But she was my first love, true love. She was a good mom and could be a good wife. She had to die when Judith was born but if only one could live with a choice she would have picked Judith. No doubt.”

Negan had many doubts in his life but knew that the peaceful calm on Rick's face was a truth he knew. Lori had her faults but was a good woman.

“That's cute Rick. Real fucking cute. She was worthwhile. She was a good wife at some point and you were a great husband. Hallmark through and through. I'm shit, my wife was all that poetry you're spewing and then some. If I hadn't invaded her life cancer probably wouldn't have ate her up.”

Rick punched his shoulder and it hurt a bit, harder than what he thought was good manners.

“Hey I'm pregnant!”

Rick rolled his eyes.“Negan you are good. Not the best but I saw you give Danny a toy, Judith baby food, and you know I seem to remember you saving a certain redhead two weeks ago. Those walker teeth were real close to your arm. These are all my people I'm listing.”

Negan didn't know Rick watched him that closely. “Yeah I'm such a goody two shoes.” Negan retorted, it was bullshit.

“Shut up.” A lovely smile graced Rick's face as he shoved ice playfully in Negan's mouth. Maybe this could work out.

“Ouch!”

Rick had whacked his head with a spoon. “And cancer doesn't transform cells because good people are around bad people either dumbass.”

Yeah, this could really work out.


	5. Carol Knows All

Negan cracked an eye open and he doesn't feel queasy or drained. Rick's turned towards him sleeping at he stares, he wondered what having Rick would feel like. He was always attracted to him, since he met blue eyes when he got out of his RV. What attracted him more was crying, rich sobs escaping with a mourning voice. Negan always knew he was sick in the head so he just rubbed one out that night, unbothered by why it was to Rick's pain.

“Hey.” Rick smiled at him. “Feel better?”

Negan touched his stomach. “Yeah I'm good.”

“Great, we just got to stay away from meat.”

Negan smirked. “Yeah Ricky? If I took that advice earlier we wouldn't be in this mess.”

Rick laughed at his dumb joke. “I got things to do. You should rest.”

“So someone can kill me in my sleep? No thanks.”

Negan shivered at Rick running his hand up his arm. “No one's going to do that Negan. Just relax.”

Rick got up and Negan stared at his tight black jeans holding up his nice ass. “I should have tapped that instead.” Negan whispered to himself.

It was only 10 AM despite Negan blowing chunks, eating or at least trying after two missed meals, and napping with Rick. It was time to explore what he already knew. Alexandrian’s either ran from him or gave judging looks.

He crossed the road to walk between two houses and there was Carol sitting at a side table sharpening a container of knives. 

“Looking a little pale Negan.” The gray haired woman didn't look up once from sharpening.

This is the thing. Gabriel was one weird fucker but this woman always creeped him out the most. He would never tell a soul that he thought she may just be the one to kill him and it would probably be brutal.

“I'm just taking a walk.”

Carol didn't acknowledge him, instead looking at her knife. Something was up with Negan and she knew it wasn't worrisome but most likely problematic.

It felt good stretching out his legs and he subconsciously rubbed his belly a few times forgetting about Carol as he walked on because honestly she could kill him whenever and he had no chance so his thoughts shifted to Rick. The man confused him, he was nice to him but could also be as menacing as him. That day that changed his life proved it and seeing Carl, the serial killer tell a story of Rick biting out a juggler was certainly true, Negan didn't think one part of the story was embellished.

Negan imagined fucking Rick hard almost every night before they did it and even in his dreams he never plowed Rick ass as hard as the man did to him. The memory this morning of Rick feeding him ice chips came to mind and Negan halted his steps, denying that he daydreamed of a content relationship with him was getting harder.

He sign, exhaling deeply at being back at a safe house, away from Carol. His head hit the door in relief and he rubbed his stomach.

“I don't know why you're still here.” Carl brought him out of his thoughts. He bit into an apple, arms crossed against his chest looking fierce. “You are supposed to take your shit and leave.”

This kid was never scared and secretly he admired that. Taking his hand away from his belly and scratching his nose like he had no care in the world he straightened his shoulders. “Kid, you better show some respect or I'll make you sing to me for an hour.”

Carl cringed. “I get my dad has some weird crush on you but it ain't happening.”

Huh, that was informative. “Yeah keep it up and I'll make you stay for the show. Maybe videotape our hanky panky?”

Carl fake gagged and Negan smirked. He stood straighter and met Carl’s gaze as he came closer, looming over him. “Kid, you have no idea.” 

“Carl.”

They both looked in Rick's direction and his son scoffed. “Im off to Enid's.”

“What were y'all doing?” Rick asked.

Negan scratched his scruff, shit was getting long. “Conversating.”

“About?”

Negan sat in the chair and traced a finger along a crack in the table. “Chill. I wasn't threatening him.”

Rick started making a sandwich. “I know.”

Negan looked at Rick's backside. “Well I did threaten a little. You didn't tell him.”

Rick was making lunch, chopping as he spoke. “It's complicated, as you know. I got to think about how to handle it.”

“The boy knows about babies and gay sex. It's not that difficult to explain unless he's operating on me and needs to know my insides.”

Rick put a sandwich cut in triangles and a sliced apple in front of him. Negan spread with warmth.

“It's still complicated. I know my family and the Alexandrians are cool now but history has shown people rise up. They will want to fight back eventually, all of them. Us having a baby complicates that so yeah, it's complicated. It's fucked up.”

Hearing Rick curse all Southern like made Negan's dick twitch in his pants, he also understood it being a mess. “I'll step back. You know I can't get totally off with nothing but I can take less, ease the burden.”

Rick looked astonished but bit his lip and there was that erection again.

“I want a real truce, not a baby truce.” Rick pointed to his stomach.

“I don't know what you want me to say Rick. I'm not a charitable guy but this baby means things and staying full force or backing off is all I got.”

Rick sat down beside him, eating his lunch. His legs brushed Negan's and wasn't that cozy? Neither one knew in that moment things were changing between them as they sat in silence.

Negan felt the throb of hunger in his stomach. Eating was becoming a hassle but this tasted good. He looked at Rick eating his own food, the same as his, he was thankful he saw nothing to make him heave. “My stomach can take it.”

A small smile formed on Rick's face and if Negan thought a full smile was pretty well this pulled at him harder. “Lori had real bad morning sickness. This was all she could eat.” He tapped his own plate.

When lunch was over Negan was sad to see Rick go. All concentration was on him and when Negan recommended returning home Rick shook his head and said he should rest and worry about traveling tomorrow morning. When he left Negan sunk onto the couch feeling Rick had more to say that was unspoken.

“Rick!”

Rick rolled his eyes before turning around, he loved Carol but she was like a nosy neighbor that could potentially kill you.

“I see Negan is still here.”

Turning to the woman he assessed her body language, it wasn't threatening or guarded. “Yeah, he will leave in the morning.”

“Something is up with him.”

Huffing Rick took in her speculating eyes and container of knives. “He's not threatening us. He just got sick yesterday and he's resting it off.”

“By staying here without a Savior and taking morning strolls?”

It was official, Carol was becoming Dale. Suspicious and she would surely somehow solve the puzzle herself even though male pregnancy was a first. A pang hit his heart thinking of a friend he hasn't thought of in years.

“Are you going to tell me or am I going to have to find out myself?”

Michonne and Daryl were his closest allies but him and Michonne had a one night stand that could have become something more if Negan didn't come their way. Daryl had been held hostage and escaped but didn't get retaliated against despite Negan making a few empty threats. Negan never looked for him. A few weeks back Daryl arched like a cat when he accidentally walked by him not thinking and Negan just looked at him then continued talking to Rick. It was the first time Negan delivered an empty promise and he wasn't going to mention the pregnancy to him right now. Daryl wouldn't want to know this even though he never judged a thing. Carol was the only choice as a confidante.

“He's pregnant.”

Carol blinked and strangled out a weird sound.


	6. An Ally

Carol garbled out her confusion. “Pregnant?”

“Come on.”

Rick led her inside an empty house. As soon as they hit the front door Rick ran around downstairs ensuring no one was lurking.

“I don't know how it happened. I hated him and he was always looking at me, checking me out and then he came at me. Part of me wanted to kill him and then he kept talking. Running his mouth like he was going to fuck me and I just snapped. I fucked him and it wasn't sweet but I wasn't too rough you know? It was hate sex.”

Rick ran a hand along his scruff and exhaled, then started to pace more. “Then he keeps coming back acting like I'm going to let him fuck me then he starts hinting I can top again and all I want to do is murder him with his stupid Lucille and then he gets sick and I find him crying on the bathroom floor. There's no way he's lying, he has symptoms like Lori did and he's got this weird stomach fat thing going on. He's pregnant!”

Carol watches Rick go through phases as he talked. Disbelief, fear, acceptance. Then there's everything he's saying. A series of “Fucks.” Rick rarely cusses, the man knows what topping is and she never guessed he swung that way, Daryl on the other hand…

Rick stood pacing and wiping his eyes.

“You two will be fine. It’s just a baby.” Carol said with peaceful acceptance, her voice too cherry for the murderous woman.

“He's a man Carol! Ass baby? Gah!”

Carol tried to contain her laugh but ended up spitting it out, doubling over in laughter. She cried the hardest she had in awhile as Rick looks on unamused. 

“Ass baby?” Carol wiped her eyes. “Silly Rick, he will be cut open.”

Rick crossed his arms. “I know that! It doesn't change a damn thing. I'm glad you are amused but they’re going to kill me!” He pointed outside.

“I'd like to see them try.” Carol’s evil glare was back. “It's unconventional but we will make due.”

That’s the one thing he liked about Carol. When it came to family she was always supporting with a pinch of threatening violence. “Thanks Carol, that means a lot.”

“Pssh, I'm going to enjoy watching him squirm.” 

Rick frowns. “Carol please don't. He's sensitive.”

“Sensitive?”

Rick nods before shrugging. “His symptoms are in overdrive. It's like he's experiencing it all with a bigger reaction. I just found out he's pregnant and I can't count on two hands how much he's cried.”

Carol laughed out loudly then.

“It's not funny. It's...sad.”

“Oh Rick don't tell me you're falling for him!”

“No! Of course not! He's carrying my child. I don't like seeing him emotional, it's not good for the baby.”

The only startling thing for Carol was hearing the pregnancy. Sure, she didn't think Rick was gay but she had seen some interesting looks exchanged between the pair and seeing Rick esaperated now gave her insight. It was there all along.

“Sure whatever you say pumpkin.”

Carol went to open the door but Rick slammed it shut. “No, don't you do that Dale thing.”

“Dale?”

“Yeah that I know it all bullshit.”

Carol smiled remembering her friend.

“Rick I'll help you...and that ass but you want the truth? It makes a lot of sense.”

“Please tell me what makes sense in all this.”

“You TOPPING his ass for one.” Carol finger quoted the “topping” and Rick grabbed her fingers.

“Stop.”

Carol gave a charming smile. “I guess we will see when Negan does or doesn't have a baby number two.”

Rick's mouth was too wide to stop her when she left.

———————————————————

Rick walked upstairs. He hadn't seen Negan around so he opened the guest door after a knock. Negan looked at him in pure misery. The hot water bottle was on the floor, Negan on his side with an arm hanging off the bed.

“Hey.”

Rick saw Negan's eyes turn glossy but he didn't speak back.

“You okay?”

Negan groaned.

“Hey. Talk to me.”

“Feel like shit.”

“Baby can hear you, watch your language.” Rick half joked.

“Still feel like fucking shit.”

Rick picked up the hot water bottle. “Why didn't you use this?”

“Can't move.” Negan grumbled.

Sighing Rick picked it up and went to prepare it. When he went back upstairs Negan hadn't moved an inch. Rick picked his arm up and Negan startled. He pushed it under Negan's stomach and he moaned.

“You need to eat.”

Negan closed his eyes.

“Negan.”

“Leave me the fuck alone!” Frustrated eyes met his.

Rick went to the door then thought better of it. He closed the door instead and went to the bathroom.

Negan froze when his shirt was yanked up and hands smeared lotion on his back. “I swear you are having a baby Negan, you aren't one!” The hands kept massaging him and Negan wanted to yell stop but it felt too good. Rick was angry with his assaulting massage. “You have to eat and you have to move! You're probably sore because your fat ass hasn't moved all day. Stop feeling sorry for yourself! Women do this all the time.”

Rick was rubbing his ass and damn those hands were skilled. Still the words stung.

“But I'm a guy! This isn't supposed to be happening to me.” Negan sounded frail, his voice sad and broken.

“Negan I'm sorry.”

“I know you think I'm just a whiny bitch but Rick I'm not supposed to have a kid. What if I bleed out? What if I lose it because...because it's unnatural.” Negan started to cry at saying the last part.

Rick didn't think Negan could have bonded with their child already.

“Negan are you scared your going to lose it?”

Negan sobbed then. “I've done too much bad Rick. Some cute baby? I don't deserve that. Lucille and me tried and then she got sick. I'm not supposed to have one without her and men aren't made for childbirth.”

Rick massaged at his ribs. Lucille was more than a deranged man's weapon then. “You are having a baby Negan. Obviously you got the parts. Have faith they work.”

Negan shook. “Whatever happens I'm here.” Rick said confidently.

Rick saw Negan panting, holding it in. He continued to rub his sore muscles. Silence lingered until Negan spoke up.“Do you think I can be a good dad?”

“Yes.” Rick answered with no hesitation. “Negan I've seen worse men in lockup that loved their children.”

“I'm sure a small town deputy like you saw plenty of serial killing murderers like me.”

“I've seen a few and I've seen a lot more abuse their kids. Hit babies even, killing their own. Negan you don't have to be a good guy to be a good dad but it helps.”

“I killed Glenn, Maggie's pregnant.” 

“Things change, people change.”

Negan turned on his back. “You think I'm going to let you have it easy now don't you?”

“No I just think being a dad is going to change you.”

Negan looked into a dazzling ocean of blue. “You're too nice, it might be your downfall.”

“I don't want to be bad, I have been and I didn't feel better protecting my family at a strangers loss, I know I had to though. I've straddled both lines and being bad always made me feel worse.”

Negan huffed. “You're screwed.”

Rick touched Negan's stomach. “Yeah maybe.”

Negan moaned out. “I know I need to move but I felt like I was going to vomit all over myself all day today.”

“Carol can find us a tea to help with pregnancy.”

“Yeah just tell her my pregnant ass needs it.”

“I already told her what's going on.”

“You did what?”

“She knew something was up.”

“Of course she did! She's a creepy fucker but that still gives you no right to talk about my pregnancy.”

“Our pregnancy.”

“Oh no you don't! I'm doing all the hard shit and you just get to sit and watch. You shouldn't have told her!”

“Everyone is going to know soon enough!”

Negan looked at him hurt.

“Fuck you!”

Rick watched him pull back the covers and run to the bathroom.

“Negan.” Rick tried the handle which was naturally locked.

Rick sat on the bed staring at the closed door. He ran a hand through his curls and sighed when Negan started to cry loudly. Rick sighed in frustration at the locked door.

Minutes passed and Rick looked at his ticking watch, forty five minutes passed. The crying had stopped eleven minutes ago.

“Negan.”

There was no answer.

“Look Negan I’m not trying to hurt you. I'm sorry.”

“Yeah? What the fuck are you sorry for?”

Rick tapped into the Lori pregnancy era of his memory, actually the whole marriage. “I'm sorry I can't experience what your going through with you. That I'm thinking without speaking. You're right, I should have consulted with you before telling Carol the news. I know you're scared but he or she is going to be fine and I'll let you Lucille anyone who gives you shit.”

Rick cringed at the permission he gave, hoping Negan didn't take it literally. The door opened and Negan was puffy eyed but smiling, it was stunning. “I'm not serious. We can't let the hormonal big guy kill everyone that makes him mad.” 

Negan huffed.

“Come on.” Rick tapped the bed.

“I'm not supposed to be lazy.”

Rick tapped it again and Negan got in.

“I am sorry.” Rick breathed out.

“I know I'm being irrational.”

Rick looked down at Negan's stomach to see their hands joined with no idea how it happened. Negan's eyes were closed but he saw tears falling. He thought Lori had it bad but he had no idea.

“Hungry?”

Negan's lip quivered and more tears flowed. Negan looked at his stomach knowing their child was there, probably having a hard time with his stress. Rick skimmed his hand lower, under Negan's waistband.

“Rick what are you...?”

“Shhh.” Rick whispered.

Rick didn't have any thought but that Negan needed a release. He swiped up Negan's shaft and ran a thumb over his slit eliciting a moan. 

“Like that?”

“Shit yeah, you know I do.”

Rick swirled at his tip more gathering his precum to smear down his shaft. “I'm going to take care of you Negan.” He cupped his balls then rolled them back and forth. “Think I can make you dirty? Milk you dry all over these sheets?”

“Fuck Rick.” Negan bucked up into his hands.

“No moving darling.” His sweet southern drawl making a command caused him to drip more. “You're so wet Negan.” Rick pulled back his boxers. “And look at that nice big cock, maybe I should have let it have a go at my ass.”

Negan moaned, Rick's wet jerks filled the room. “Rick.”

Rick increased his jerking. “No I think we did just right. I liked fucking your tight ass, coming deep inside you. I did this.” Rick touched his pregnancy.

Negan moaned out, spreading his legs further. “I should fuck you right now, fill you up and make you keep me in. I can find something to do that. Make you store my cum for later or maybe I should make you taste me.”

Negan cried out, Rick's twisting wrists were going faster and Rick leaned over him, kissing him and that's all it took to have Negan release. Rick rubbed at his mushroomed head then leaned down to kiss his white slit. Negan moaned in sensitivity, he felt he could go again. He watched Rick wipe his cum and a smirk form like their first time together.

Rick smeared his substance onto Negan’s lips. “Lick it off.” Negan did so slowly, putting on a sultry show. “Good boy. Now you eat for real right?”

Rick cocked his head only slightly and Negan moaned out, already hardening again. “Deal but only if you jerk me off again tonight.”

Rick smiled and kissed him roughly, all tongue. “Deal.” He whispered lowly and gave Negan another kiss.


	7. Sugar Bug

Negan spread out lazy, he subconsciously patted his stomach and left his hand there. Rick saw him sigh and spread further across the bed, he was smiling with no teeth and Rick saw beauty that he hadn't before. Negan always sneered and barked, teeth snapping and taunting in its smile.

The sheets were then pulled up covering him up to his shoulders and Rick could see his hardness standing to attention and he laughed. “What?” Negan asked losing that smile.

“You sure are ready for me to give you more attention.”

Negan looked down and his grin returnedalways ready for sex.

Rick walked slowly towards him and saw Negan follow each step. “I guess I should feed you then.” He stroked up Negan's covered shaft root to tip and winked as he strutted off.

Negan nestled in further and thought about how he cried and then just as easily came with Rick's help. He didn't mind it happening, he had a thing for Rick since day one. His eyes looked to the window and then the ceiling, he almost gagged thinking Rick would bring him meat then knew he definitely wouldn't do that to him. Negan put a hand to his stomach. “Hey I don't know what life I can give you, me and your...dad we are on opposite lines and then how am I supposed to keep you safe? Keep those things from eating you?”

A different panic settled in his heart. This was no place for a child. Here he was worried about him, him, him. His child would never know watching tv, doing homework, or shopping at the mall. “Oh shit I'm sorry baby.”

“Negan?”

“Hey, that's my dinner huh?”

There was an awkward fakeness on Negan's lips but he handed over the plate. Negan was sitting up in bed holding his stomach in remorse. Negan picked at the food and after eating small bites started to gulp down big spoonfuls. “Got to keep the baby fed right? Keep them fucking healthy.” Negan spoke with his mouth full, venom spewing out and he gulped down a glass of water.

“Negan.”

“Good shit you made me Rick, delicious.” The food kept being inhaled.

“Negan.”

“Why the fuck do you keep saying my name and like that huh? I know my name, it's sure not anyone else's name. My parents had the eccentric part right.”

Rick took the plate from him. “As much as I dreamed of you choking to death things have changed.”

Rick sat closer to Negan and took his hand and squeezed it. “I leave your for twenty minutes and you freak out.”

“I'm not freaking out, I'm eating like you wanted.”

“And you’re upset.”

“Am not.”

“Are too.

“Am not!”

“Negan.”

“What the fuck Rick? It's my name, not oxygen! You can damn breath without speaking my name, it's the one thing I can't take from you.”

“Talk to me Negan.”

“I'm just hungry.” He lied.

They both looked at the plate and Rick took a spoonful of fruit salad and fed it to Negan. It was weird but comforting being fed each bite from Rick, his face was even wiped a few times. Both were comfortable in the calm silence.

“How do you do it with Judith? I saw you on that tape talking about being on the road unprotected. How did you keep her safe while also protecting your friends and Carl?”

Rick smiled. “I had my family. I didn't do it alone. We didn't have food or water. We ate fire roasted dogs and licked dew off leaves. I slept at night, Judith curled under me, let others take watch and even when I was lightheaded and aching I knew if I died she would still live. If Carl died she would still live. Daryl, Carol, Michonne, Abraham.” Rick flicked his eyes at him at that one. “Even weird Eugene. “ Rick eyes blinked. “Well maybe not Eugene. There were more Negan. To you they are just names but to me they are my daughters keeper. They would die for her, pass her off until they each fell down. That's how I sleep at night, because I'm not alone.”

Negan whistled. “Poetry Rick.”

“The truth Negan. They hate you, each one of them wants a moment alone with you but half of this baby is mine. Our baby will live because they will love all of him or her, not just half.”

Negan smiled then. “I think your right Ricky.”

“I know I am.”

Rick still fed Negan the remainder of his plate and Negan was more at ease. He hated it, first Negan was scared to even have their baby then he feared losing it and now he feared it's future.

Rick threaded fingers through Negan's short hair. “I want you to give our baby a name.”

“What?”

Rick pointed to Negan's stomach. “Give them an identity.”

“Lola.” Negan joked.

Rick rolled his eyes, Negan needed something to ground him, this child didn't need to be an it or them but a cute nickname. He laid his hand on Negan's stomach. “Hey sugar bug you hear your daddy here?”

“Or are you daddy and I'm papa?” Rick asked Negan.

Negan couldn't help but place his hands on top of Rick's and sigh. “I guess I have more gray.”

Rick winked. “And there's your papa speaking. He's got a big mouth, you have to ignore him most times.”

“Hey!”

“Tell sugar bug I'm wrong.” Rick smirked.

“Sugar bug your daddy's wrong most of the time but we're going to have to lie and make him feel superior.”

Rick was going to retort but Negan yanked him down.

“Sugar bug is going to need earphones because you promised to get me off.” Negan whispered into his ear that he had against his lips. Rick grunted at the shiver making his dick twitch, there was one way to shut Negan up and to calm him down.

“How you want it my leathered stud?”

Negan would laugh at Rick's corny come on if he wasn't needing another rub out. “What are you going to let me do?” Negan purred and squeezed Rick's asscheek.

“Whatever you want.” Rick said and climbed on Negan and grinded down on his dick. Negan moaned when covers came off and his boxers slid down, Rick stood only to undress, a bottle of lube escaped his jeans and he oozed when the cap popped. “You want my ass?”

Negan wanted so many things and grunted at Rick rubbing his palms together and smearing his dick in a sheen of shiny goo. “Maybe I should just let you watch me jerk off and then make you sleep it off.”

“Damn baby even in my dreams you were never this filthy, what comes out of your mouth.”

“I don't know, maybe what I really need is something in my mouth Negan.” Rick only thought a minute that Negan admitted his fantasies.

Rick straddled him again, pumping his dick twice and then slithering down. Negan moaned at delicious heat swallowing him, Rick's mouth hollowed out slightly before taking him all the way in and shrinking back. He had never been sucked off this good before, soft cheeks somehow dragged across his shaft, his tip bumping the back of his throat and a small part of his base rubbed by aggressive hands.

“Rick shit.”

“Hmmm.” Was Rick's reply. Negan panted at a trickle of precum he could feel slide into Rick's working mouth.

“Have you.” Negan groaned out. “Have you done this shit before?” Negan had to know. Plush flesh slid back and forth on his shaft and Rick sucked. Negan clinged to bedsheets wishing not to cum because he wanted to see how far Rick could take this.

Rick pulled off with a cocky grin. He lathered digits and Negan furrowed his brows in confusion at the action. “You want to fuck or you want the names in my little black book?” Negan widened his eyes in shock.

“No. You know what your doing but you’re no slut.”

Negan groaned in understanding, his dick straining when Rick's composure didn't change as he brushed a fingertip at his hole. He sighed, his hole puckering at an intruding digit. “No I wasn't but my friend was. Shane. He liked boys, girls, boys and girls together. Let me know what he liked, showed me what I needed too. Too bad he couldn't keep it in his pants.”

Negan cried out at two fingers thrusting in harshly, Rick looked pissed. “You though, you’re not going to do that to me. Fuck those wives back home. I'm going to give it to you so well they won't even do. They aren't going to even be able to get your dick half as hard when I'm done.”

Negan swallowed, knowing it was already true, the first fuck did him in. Rick leaned down and swallowed him in, his fingers sliding in and out of his wet walls as plush cheeks and a sinful tongue worked his cock. Rick let out small slurps that Negan felt were intentional.

“Oh fuck.” Negan moaned.

Rick found his prostate and was kneading it slowly, his mouth slowing down. “Like that?” Rick asked when he pulled off. Pads swirled his slit, fingers brushing harder.

“Shit Rick.”

“Show me you’re a good fuck. I want a mouthful of cream.”

Negan gasped when he was inhaled again. Fingers burrowed at an arch and then rubbed hard and fast, his dick was pulled in all the way and his tip pushed a bit away then back to Rick's firm throat and he grunted, bucking his hips for more to his dick or ass, he didn't know then he came hard. Rick pulled off and winked at him.

Rick's length was red and throbbing. A throaty moan left Rick when he stroked his shaft. “Come on Negan.” Negan was tired, his hands shaky but Rick's dick was on his stomach and he rubbed at his slit. Rick sighed and pushed his palm to the top of his shaft, pushing against Negan's flesh, creating his own tunnel of flesh. Negan touched his slit and Rick released on his stomach.

Negan groaned, his spent dick twitching at the load on his stomach. “Shit.”

“Yeah shit.” Rick purred, then licked broad stripes up his panting belly, eating his seed.

Rick touched Negan's flaccid dick then his own. Negan leaned up wanting a taste, the kiss was fiery and starved. Two beings finding what they needed, Negan shoved his tongue in more wishing his taste had mingled more with Rick's but his was decadent enough. Rick pulled back, eyes still black and pushed his head into the pillow with darkness. “My dirty boy.” Rick praised before claiming Negan's willing mouth once more, letting Negan know he was the one in charge.


	8. Denial

Negan woke up knowing he was pregnant and miraculously not sick. A warm body huddled to his and he closed his eyes. “Damn.” He whispered. Rick's blue eyes always got him imagining dirty things but he never thought it would be easy on Rick's end to accept whatever they had, if it wasn't filled with dick jokes and Rick's angry looks. Now Rick was taking care of him and taking charge in the bedroom but he still needed to go home, he was a leader.

“Morning.” Rick slurred sleepily.

“Hey I should get breakfast and go home.”

“Home?” Rick looked at him in confusion as he asked.

“Yeah home.”

Rick leaned into him sweetly and whispered, warm breath tickling the short hair near his ear. “You could stay.”

It sounded tempting but he had a community to protect and lead. “I got to go.”

Rick pouted, it was so damn cute and Negan wanted to give him any wish he desired.

“Your bodies changing so much, you need to relax. They won't know what to do to help you when you’re sick.”

“I don't need to be babied Rick.” He didn't but it felt good. He was more worried about his emotions, when he couldn't calm down. His men would laugh if he cried.

“It's not about babying you.”

“This isn't my home, your people don't like me.”

“The Saviors don't either Negan! They’re criminals and you think they will follow you when your head is down puking? They fear you, that's all. There's not much to fear when you can't hold your head up, hold Lucille.”

Negan bubbled over with anger, would Rick think the same of a woman? Negan always respected any gender.

“You're calling me a pussy, helpless because I'm pregnant.”

“No. I'm calling your group depraved. My group has morals and their not ignorant. The people you lead are savages, a gang just needing control and when you can't give it they will turn on you and find who can lead them just as gruesomely.”

Negan heard the words and knew it was true. His men weren't educated and were thieves and worse before. Rick's group were goody two shoes but they listened and strived for something better. There weren't fight clubs here and alcohol consumed as fast as it was found. Everyone contributed somehow daily at all hours.

“I can't just live here. I don't want to.”

“You want power even if it destroys you or our child.”

Negan wished he could be a better man. It was petty to go back to people who didn't really care for him. Simon was his only true friend. Here Rick would take care of him but he was too proud. Also, he knew he had people who wouldn't make it without him. “I'll skip breakfast.” Negan packed his bag, refusing to look at Rick. He closed the door with nothing else spoken between them.

Negan was shit, he berated himself almost as hard as when he left Lucille in that hospital bed. Carol’s judging looks traveled with him as he stepped into his truck. He stalled after turning on the ignition. Rick would come running out with an excuse that made sense and would give a reason for him to stay. It became obvious that wouldn't happen and he inhaled, speeding off to the gates.

Rick wouldn't beg Negan to stay. He proved many times he was an asshole and begging or ordering wouldn't work. Dwight, Arat, many other names passed his mind and he saw none that would accept his child, it coming from Negan made it worse. Simon was the only one who would care. They didn't respect Negan, it was fear and more than once he thought no war needed starting because The Saviors would band together and take Negan's control but then he reminded himself in those times that would be worse. Negan was a tyrant but he had goals and expectations, gory order and no chaos with his iron tongued leadership.

Rick rubbed at his nose then pressed palms to his face. His baby would die there, he knew this.  
\------------------------------------------------------  
“Get in there and fucking count!” Negan screamed as he walked in his doors, his home. There were enough people in storage but he had to remind them his word was final orders.

“Boss you're back.” Simon looked happy to see him but there was more in his look.

“Yeah can't leave you shits alone too long.”

Negan impulsively opened his cabinet to get his scotch then laughed at barren shelves. 

“I'm just keeping it safe until the baby comes.”

Negan smiled and the tug to explain himself to his true friend came. “I wasn't going to drink it, just habit before I thought it out.”

“I know.” Simon's reaction as usual was pure honestly, belief in what he said.

“Did Rick just give you a place to stay or more?” Simon inquired with no smile, only concern.

“Want nitty gritty details Simon? I didn't think you swung that way.”

Simon sighed then sat down, sadness claiming him. “I see the way he looks at you and you him. I counted back these last few weeks. You two had slept together, I could sense you two were tense but it still happened.”

“What happened?”

“You would look at him when his head turned and he would look at you the same. You both refused to stare at each other at the same time but you were both still looking. I saw it happen before, I guess before he fucked you.”

Negan glared at him and Simon cleared his throat.

“Before the sex.” He amended. “I thought it was still that mutual longing but maybe you had said too much wrong and pissed him off. I even thought then lovers spat and it would end soon, that eventually there would be more shy looks your way and your ‘I don't give a shit’ checking him out.”

Negan sat by him. “It's nothing but good fucking.”

Simon shook his head. “No. It's more and with a baby it should be.”

Simon never pointed out his bullshit unless it really mattered.

“I lost Darlene, I couldn't save her. I would like to find that again, someone who gets me, faults and all. Rick's your Darlene Negan.”

His friend rarely brought up his lost love, it always came with a mix of happiness and remorse.

“He doesn't love me, just our baby.” Negan voice was gravel, he hated admitting it and hated that it hurt him.

“No Negan he loves you both.”

The thing was Simon spoke truthfully at all times, he was no liar and didn't bullshit. He also had a creepy way of knowing things that mattered, seeing things that others couldn't. It's why he was a good right hand man. He was like Daryl to Rick. Simon called him out on his shit, could spot a walker heard thirty feet away. 

Negan gawked. “Does not.”

Simon crossed his arms, stomped a foot down. He should have looked like a child but instead looked like an adult who knew his shit. “Does too. He's your Darlene.”

Shit. Rick loved Negan and maybe, just maybe Negan loved Rick a little back.

Carol knocked on the door that she thought was going to become Rick's and Negan's. there was no answer so she walked in.

“Hey Carol.”

He didn't look up as he sharpened his knife. 

“He didn't stay.”

“Why would he?” Rick laughed. 

“You're are good for him.”

“Nothing's good for him, he's a selfish jackass. Those men won't see our child as a continuation of civilization, they will just think it's wrong.”

“You should have followed him out and tried to reason with him.”

“I tried to tell him it was a mistake but he chose to leave. I can't keep him here.”

“He stayed in his truck a long while, he was waiting for you I think.”

Rick looked up then. “What would he listen to out there that he couldn't hear inside?”

“I don't know but I'm certain he wanted you to go after him.”

“And beg? Cry? I can't give him the power play he wants.”

“Maybe he just wanted to hear the right words.”

Rick scoffed. “What would that be? That he can lead us? I'll give him even more of everything he wants? I guess I should give him permission to be a selfish prick even more.”

“Maybe he just wanted to know you cared about him.” Carol explained.

“I don't give a crap about him! He's carrying my child and he ran to the lions den!”

“Rick you do care. Yeah he's selfish, egotistical but who knows how long he's been alone. If you told him to stay because he's him and leave the baby out of it then he would have stayed.”

“I don't love him Carol.” Rick barged out of the room, the lie settling into his bones. Negan didn't want to he here and Rick convinced himself he would find a way to take their child once it was born. Negan could go to hell for all he cared.


	9. Simon Saves the Day

One month later:

Negan groaned as he got out of bed and looked in the mirror, his stomach bulged but he was still built, it looked more like gaining a beer belly. Some Saviors even joked with him saying as much and damn if it wasn't hard not to cry at the tease.

“Hey sugar bug I sure miss your daddy.”

Every night and morning Negan wanted to crawl back and beg for forgiveness and cuddle next to Rick. More stares were aimed his way and Simon constantly came to him like a good soldier with the rumors, his control was dwindling down to nothing.

“We got lots of work to do.” Negan told his baby and pushed weakly on his stomach.

He whistled down the stairs and a group of men were fighting. “What the fuck are you asses doing?”

One of his least favorite men sneered at him then pointed to his pregnancy. “What's in there is a better question!”

Negan feigned confusion perfectly. “I know I need to work out more, I'm starting a diet regime today.”

Another man came up and pointed to his stomach. “My wife was a bodybuilder, I know what a built body looks like pregnant. All stomach!”

Negan laughed, it was crazy his men would see the truth but he still expected them take that pill and swallow It. “That's ridiculous!”

“It’s true!” A Savior yelled.

“He’s a freak!” Another screamed.

Negan wanted to cuss and scream but instead he was shoved down. A man kicked his stomach. Negan couldn't believe this shit! His men attacking him. He went to get up but was punched in the face. Damn, this was bad, another blow landed on his chin and then his stomach and Negan found he couldn't get up.

Rick was right, he was going to loose his baby because he was stupid. A pang shot down his stomach, a kick hit him dead center there and “freak”, “not right”, and “not our leader anymore” was yelled between punches. “Rick.” Negan whispered in pain.

A gunshot went off followed by more. Negan touched his stomach then the rest of his body that was pain free. Is that what death felt like? Painless?

“Get up Negan!” Simon was shooting each Savior in a headshot, granted there were only twelve men there so he was almost done shooting.

Negan stumbled up and Simon pushed him down the hall. “Stay here!” Negan was never a scared man but now he knew fear. He would probably try to attack someone for trying this shit but now his mind screamed he had a child to protect.

Negan wondered silently if Simon had left him, he would understand that. Every man for themselves but then Simon ran to him again, a few guns and Dr. Carson and Joseph in hand. “Lets leave this dump!” Simon barked.

Simon ran through The Sanctuary, not many were aware of the situation but when some yelled at Negan that something was wrong with him Simon would push them back and one man tried to shove Negan but Simon shot him with no hesitation.

They made it to the car, Joseph huffing at his run and Negan rolled his eyes. “For God's sake Fat Joey I'm pregnant and running faster.” 

Joey’s eyes bulged out in shock. “You're what?”

Negan wrapped an arm subconsciously around his stomach. “Everyone's talking and apparently hating on it. Don't act stupid.”

Joey stared at Negan from the backseat. “I don't keep up with the gossip.”

Negan relaxed into his seat, it made sense. Joey wasn't really popular and his mind was too genius for most.

“Shit! They’re going to come for me in Alexandria!” Negan hit his seat in frustration.

“We got this boss.” Simon said as he put on speed. “Joey?”

Negan looked back to see Joey with a few remotes.

“I'm Negan. Permission to blow it all up?” Joey asked.

Negan's looked at Simon who only smirked. “Do it.” Negan ordered.

Simon pressed on the gas and Negan looked back to see his whole place explode. “There were good people in there.” Negan wiped at fallen tears. 

“Negan they were all talking trash, they weren't Negan.”

Simon cracked some jokes and Negan knew how smart Joey was but he held some normal conversations. Dr. Carson sat mute and still as usual. His friend even tried apologizing for going behind his back with explosives but Simon feared things would get messy with Negan's issues and he was correct.

Negan cringed at Joey's snores in the backseat, his mouth wide open with a tongue hanging out. “I thought seeing Fat Joey eat was disgusting.”

“You should watch it Negan. Joseph still respected you behind your back when no one was looking. I knew where he hid the triggers. He's here because he's Negan.”

“Joey is a good man.” Negan agreed, he thought maybe he would be disloyal when living was the better chance but he never doubted Simon's judgement. Dr. Carson stared at Negan's calm composure and acceptance. He always saw anger with him before, then again it was always a medical emergency when he was involved until now. Sexual jokes were always there during baby check ups but maybe he was only uncomfortable and was trying to process things.

“We have to go to Alexandria.” Simon broke the silence.

“I know. Rick's not going to want me there though.”

“He will take you in regardless.” Simon said.

Getting closer to Alexandria when they were sure no walkers were lured out by the explosives Dr. Carson recommended checking Negan and the baby out.

“I don't need your dirty paws on me!”

“Negan your baby.” Simon reasoned.

“No! She's fine okay! Everything's okay.” 

Dr. Carson opened his door and got out to help Negan out the vehicle. “Negan I'm sure the baby's fine but it won't hurt to check.”

“Were fine! Everything’s fucking peachy.” 

Simon huffed and got out too, he walked calmly to Negan's side. “Negan I'm your friend and with no disrespect I saved your ass today. Now you're getting your ass out the car and getting checked or I'll drag you out.”

“Fucking fine okay! Fine!” Negan got slowly . “And you!” He pointed to Joseph. “No looking you perv! It's a privilege to see my sexy naked skin!”

Joseph was smart enough to put his head in his palms and leaned over in his seat.

Negan grunted as Dr. Carson lifted his shirt and pressed on his stomach. Hands checked his pulse on his wrist and pressed on his stomach before poking his back. The Doctor got out his medical bag, all he grabbed when Simon got him and listened to Negan's heartbeat with a stethoscope. 

‘Shit, my baby. They kicked me hard when they pushed down. Was it two kicks? Three? Could I have lost sugar bug? I feel her right? I would feel it if I lost her. She’s okay.’ Negan's mind rolled in waves of confusion, he couldn't lose this baby. Rick would kill him, he would want him to. Negan wanted his baby now, had realized that for weeks.

“Negan breath!” A faraway voice echoed. It was weird listening, he felt strange. Like maybe he was floating. A sharp sting slapped his arm hard and he hissed.

“Damn it Simon! I'm bruised enough.” 

He gasped for air and Simon held his face. “Sorry you were going to pass out there.”

“The baby's fine.” Dr. Carson assured him. He was pretty sure but not one hundred percent. Everything made sense now, Negan fighting the checkup and joking as usual as he yelled demands at Joseph. His boss was scared.

“Rick will get us a sonogram machine and everything will be back on schedule.” Dr. Carson reassured him.

The ride made Negan tired and he fell asleep. At some point before Negan let out quiet sniffle but everyone remained quiet figuring it was a release on the trauma of his Saviors. Dr. Carson wondered if Alexandria would treat him well and Joseph was bummed his last snowball was destroyed, he would never have chocolate cake again. Simon just worried over his friend, Rick would take them in and he just hoped both men would pull the large stick out their asses. Then he laughed because gay? Sticks up their behinds?

Rosita watched a familiar van drive up and she flipped them off but signaled the other Alexandrian to open the gate. She yelled down to Simon who waved his hand out. “Rick's home asswipes!”

Simon parked in front of the white house that seemed too pretty in these times and they all jumped out, Negan was slow again and Rick ran out of the house, Rosita had radioed him. 

“Negan?” Rick touched a cut lip.

“I'm fine.”

“Come on in.” Rick sighed taking in the other three.

The group sat in an uncomfortable silence. Rick, Negan, and Simon doing most of the talking. He was relieved Simon made a future plan and no Saviors would come for Negan or any of Alexandria but there were innocent lives lost. Elderly, people just trying to live, and children. Not many were lucky to grow old with walkers inhabiting the earth.

Negan was calm and even spoke of his own assault as if speaking of the weather. It was a tad overwhelming hearing his demeanor never change but there were no inappropriate remarks. 

“I'll set you all up next door.”

Negan almost choked on his water, knowing that meant him too. Part of him hoped Rick would welcome him back with wide open arms.  
\----------------------------------------------------  
Simon jumped up and down in a sitting position on his bed, it was nicer than anything he had in awhile. Dr. Carson volunteered to check on Maggie and Rick thought maybe things happened for a reason. Joseph was awkward as usual and stammered under his breath before grabbing a book and heading to his room.

Negan sat on the couch and Rick crossed his arms leering at him.

“Damn Rick I didn't gut your puppy.”

Rick gave him another irritated look. “You leave and then don't come back! I get you’re a leader Negan but really? Now you've slaughtered your own people and expect a bed!”

“It wasn't my plan Rick. Simon and Joey did that behind my back but they would come here. For me, Judith. I kept them on an even moral line but they would be evil now. Rape, pillage.”

“They were already stealing from us! What's the difference?”

“Fifty percent!”

Rick rubbed his nose. “ Eighty Negan! Eighty percent!”

Negan deep breathed. “I'm not perfect, I'm the big bad wolf I get it but it had to happen. They would have killed me if not for Simon.”

“You're full of shit! I can't wait for you have our baby so I can be done with your fucking ass.”

It stung and Negan opened his mouth to say a few choice words but Simon cut in.

“Enough Rick! Shut up! We're taking a walk!” Simon screamed.

It was odd witnessing the level headed man snap at him and then he was shoved forcefully out the door, the last thing he saw was Negan frowning down at his shoes.

“You don't know when to quit do you?”  
Simon gave him a harmless push.

“He's made a big mistake and he shouldn't have went back to begin with!” Rick argued.

“I made a judgment call, their deaths are on me and you expect a man like Negan to fall in line just because you say so? If you were knocked up would you give it all up?”

“My people wouldn't try to kill me!”

“But you would step back and let another run Alexandria? If Negan knocked you up would you go to The Sanctuary?”

Rick swallowed thickly at Simon's questions. He knew he wouldn't but still. “He risked our child.”

“That's right! He did. He could have miscarried, there's a chance he still could.”

“What?” Rick felt regret and concern fill him in place of anger.

“Oh now you care! He was beaten. Dr. Carson checked him out but Negan needs an ultrasound. It's the only way to know for sure. His own men turned on him and he tried to refuse an exam. He cried in the car on the way here. He was scared and then we got here, finally safe and you snap on him!”

Rick felt ashamed and he assessed Negan's friend, he was a real one. 

“I didn't think it through.”

“You didn't and you sent him to the guest house after a big scare. He talked about you non stop back home. ‘Sugar bug I know daddy misses you. ‘I miss your daddy’ and blah, blah, blah. It was sickening.”

“I need to talk to him.”

Simon lit up a cigarette. “Yeah? Well don't be an ass if you do huh?”

Rick smirked. “I won't, I promise. You're a good friend.”

Simon winked and Rick knew he could respect him then, he sensed trust and a potential ally. 

“Yeah and you could be a decent lay if you get that stick out your ass.” Simon spat but his tone turned seductive at the end. No wonder those two were friends with a colorful tongue like that.

Rick turned to walk away.

“Hey Rick?”

He turned back to Simon. “Yeah?”

“Dr. Carson told Negan the baby's fine. It probably is but there was no sense in stressing him out when we have no ultrasound machine yet so keep it under wraps.”

He swallowed thickly not agreeing with the choice but understanding why it was made. “Gotcha.”

Rick exhaled deeply. It was time to apologize. In the end Rick felt relief knowing he was doing so, he really had missed Negan but lying to him about their child was going to be hard.


	10. Chapter 10

Rick walked inside the house glad it wasn't dark yet. He went to Negan's door to find it open. Negan was hunched over talking quietly.

“I could have lost you sugar bug just because I was stupid and couldn't listen to your daddy. Please let me know you're there.”

Rick looked at a man who was seen as angry and gruesome, depicted as pure evil but now he looked broken and average. A person just trying to keep hope.

He pushed the door open wider. “Negan.”

Negan wasn't wearing a shirt and his voice caught in his lungs. “I don't need any more of your crap. I'm wrong, evil. I get it. I tried to sacrifice my child for power.”

Rick sat down. “I came to apologize.”

Negan laughed. “You do no wrong right? So what can you apologize for?”

“I know you were scared and I didn't help make it better.”

Negan grabbed a pillow and hugged it tightly. “I didn't want this to happen. There were children and women just trying to make It. They would have been raped or thrown to the walkers for fun if I stayed here. Now they're just dead.”

Rick became enlightened in that moment and looked at Negan curiously. All this time he saw it as lust for power but now saw maybe it was a need to protect, mean something in this shit world.

Having Rick near brought Negan closer to admitting his fears. Rick was the only one to love his child as much as him.

“Oh God I can't feel her.”

“Negan?”

Negan held his stomach and cried out. “I'm supposed to have this feeling, a connection but I never have and now I don't know if she's alive.”

“Negan.”

“I should feel it, her presence. They lied to me I know it.”

“Negan.”

“They said I was fine but they can't know without a sonogram. Freaking liars.”

“Negan!”

“What Rick?” Negan asked resigned, bitterness seeped in because out of everyone Rick should listen to him and understand.

“The baby's fine.” Rick damn grinned and his tone was confident, all knowing.

‘Fuck this’ Negan thought. ‘He doesn't know shit and is going to smile? Fuck his pretty eyes and gorgeous face.’

“You don't know crap.”

Rick smirked and grabbed his hand. “You're not cursing as much.”

“And?”

“And you called our baby a she.”

“So I slipped.” Negan argued wanting to kick Rick out and sleep.

“And you didn't curse. At all.”

Negan scooted up in bed and turned on his side.“Maybe I'm too slow to get your point.”

Rick got on his side too and touched Negan's hair. “Lori my wife. She knew Carl was a boy, started calling him a he at eight weeks in. She knew it and I thought she was crazy until I saw it myself. There was no surprised face at the gender reveal appointment. She knew.”

Negan looked at him keeping tears at bay. “Rick.”

“No! You don't do that! That's not the first slip up right? You just knew it, that's your connection Negan. You know that's out baby’s a girl. She's okay.”

“Really?”

Rick saw hope, Negan's wet eyes wanting to feel it was true but it wasn't a lie to comfort him. Like Lori knew Carl was a boy he knew now they were having a daughter.

“Yes Negan. She's fine, you know this.”

Negan cried then. “I really didn't. They kicked me so hard. My Savior's wanted her dead and all I could think was please let me go with her.”

Rick's unexpected hand grabbing him almost made him yelp but then Rick leaned into him. “It doesn't matter now, everything's alright.”

An ocean of blue peered into him and subconsciously he placed Rick's hands on his stomach. He missed feeling them there, having Rick in bed with him. His lips on his even when rough.

He gasped when Rick yanked his head up and kissed him, it was sweet, requesting entrance in and he parted his lips for a slow kiss. It wasn't enough and Negan pushed his tongue into Rick's warm mouth taking what he wanted, showing Rick how much he missed him.

He sighed when hands reached into his boxers and stroked him in fast tugs. Teeth nipped at his lips and neck, nails dug into his waist demanding his moans. 

“I've missed fucking your tight ass.” Rick husked biting hard at his neck.

“So sweet, trying to win points there.” Negan starred up unimpressed.

Sharp teeth broke the flesh of his neck and Rick unzipped his jeans and yanked them down.

“File a complaint then.” Rick exposed his chest undressing in haste and Negan took time to take in his figure. He was lean but cut, muscle threatening to emerge. “Shirt off.” Rick ordered.

Negan complied groaning at grinds against him. “You've been a bad boy not visiting me.” He was turned on his stomach and a belt rustled. “No looking back.” The demand was made with a firm swat. 

Rick exhaled, spreading Negan's legs, seeing a swollen cock dripping onto sheets. He touched an ass pinching cheeks and kneading. Before Rick rarely allowed himself to think of being fucked hard in a closet by Negan but things changed and now all he saw was the one beneath him begging for his dick. To suck it, let it sink in deeper, to praise him. “Tell me how much you want my dick.”

A finger was lazily petting his hole and Negan pushed back. “Fuck me please.”

Rick spanked his ass hard with a belt, not convinced.

It was humiliating being told to beg but he was stroked harder, a finger pushed into his walls and thrusted shallowly. Precum was already being deposited down his shaft but then he was ignored. Metal of a buckle pushed against his hole, cold making him gasp.

“Want some attention here?” Leather nudged inside making Negan whine and buck back.

“Speak up!”

Nails raked down his asscheeks marking him in red streaks.

“Tell me.” Rick whispered, pumping him once.

Smirking at non compliance Rick coated a finger pad in spit and toyed as his hole. His hard dick seeped at Negan's quiet moans and he removed his finger when an ass thrusted back.

“You can't stop being bad.” Rick growled.

Scratches dug into his already broke skin burrowing deeper.

“Please.” It was garbled, almost incoherent.

“Say what?” Rick was loud in his question popping Negan's perky ass.

“Please Rick fuck me. Please.”

Rick pried his ass apart and smacked his hole with his palm. “Don't say such filthy words around our child. You were doing so good.”

Negan cried out at a wet finger caressing his rim and Rick stroked himself at Negan clenching and unclenching his ass on air.

“I might can forgive you since you're gifting me with such a pretty sight.”

It took a moment for Negan to realize he was panting at a finger breaching hard and deep. A lube cap popped open pouring slick onto his hole. Two fingers pumped into him fully, fast and constant rubs assaulting his nub.

It was instinctive to push his elbows lower and arch his ass out wanting more friction.

“Tell me you wanted this since you left.”

“Yes Rick I have.”

Negan let out a breathy sigh when three fingers stretched him wide open and a hand stroked him hard.

All hands left him but he felt a tip beach him. Rick slid in to the hilt and thrusted hard. His chest beat down on the bed as Rick fucked him hard and deep, dragging his shaft up and down his walls.

Negan seeped at teeth biting into his shoulders. He collapsed too tired after the day.

“Turn on your side.” Rick ordered pulling out.

Doing so Rick entered him again with no warning. His knee was bent up and his leg lifted. Rick burrowed in impossibly deeper.

“Rick.” Negan let out a sob not understanding why.

“It's okay.” Rick's voice became honey sweet.

Fingers combed through his slicked back hair and he was jerked slowly. Rick still rammed in deep but it was done nicely. His body was rocked slow with no hurry.

He thought back to his dead people, the attempt made on his child's life. Tears released out.

Rick spanked his full ass. “Keep it up and I'm going to tie you to the headboard.”

“What?” He asked unintelligently.

“Think only of me and what I'm doing to your ass.”

Fingers pinched his dick and his leg pulled up higher until he cried out for another reason, at Rick's large dick being swallowed down.

Nails dug into his waist, thighs, and dick demanding attention. Rick sucked on his ear then bit his neck. His prostate was ignored until Rick slammed against it repeatedly.

“Let me see you spill.” Rick whispered in his ear hard and firm.

His balls were pinched hard and damn did it hurt but as a wet tongue licked up between his shoulders he spilled out.

“That's real good baby.”

Rick pulled out swatting his ass hard. Negan's tired body strained to turn around and he watched Rick tug on his dick moaning with his gaze on him.

“Come here baby. Eat me up.”

Negan stilled, mesmerized by Rick's glistening tip and working hands.

“Negan now! Be my cleanup boy.”

He moved over pondering if Rick wanted him to suck him off but he moaned at his hair being yanked down. Rick firmly grasped his head and pushed his tip in past his pretty pink lips.

“That's all I need in.” Rick assured him still tugging on his shaft.

He saw Rick's stomach pant, his hair was held tighter and a tight little moan escaped Rick's lips.

A thick load of seed released into his mouth and he lapped at Rick's slit as he swallowed him down.

Rick yanked on his chin and kissed him too brash. 

“Good Negan, you're so good I don't have to tell you that. You know what to do with my fat dick.”

He whined at the approval shocking himself once again. Strong arms pulled him into Rick's chest.

“Lets sleep babydoll. Tomorrow we move your shit into my room.”

A pleased smile that had long been deserved formed as he leaned in closer to Rick.

“Oh my gosh, their finally done.” Carol whispered from her room across from them. She pulled a pillow away from her ear now that she could sleep.


	11. An Object Used

Negan hummed awake, his dick being pumped slowly. He opened them to Rick's sleepy face looming beside his growing belly.

“You know how to wake a man up.”

There was that glint again, blues reflecting with mischief.

“Oh you're going to wake up for sure.” Rick promised.

Negan watched the curly haired man drag his hanging belt away from the headboard 

“We're cool. I forgive your dumbass for leaving me and you forgave my cruelness when you first came back right?”

Negan swallowed, his mouth dry.

“Yeah Ricky. We're good.”

Rick folded the belt and snapped it. “Good then we're almost wrapped up. Go pee.”

“What?”

“I think you're going to want to pee first.”

Negan nodded and got up. 

He really did need to pee, a long stream pouring down. There was no doubt Rick wanted to tear his ass up and not in the way he did last night. Flushing the toilet and staring at his reflection he saw how much better he looked.

Rick was sitting on his knees staring at the bathroom door. His toothy smile was stunning but playful. 

“Good thing you're already naked. I want you to get into position.”

A throaty gurgle escaped him and his brain froze up. “Position?”

Rick shook his head dragging his hand down his chest. “My smart little Negan don't play dumb.”

He was smart but there had been no discussions of positions or even punishments for that matter. Despite it all, Rick was right. The man had a belt, there was only one position. Rick patted the bed patiently.

Negan awkwardly climbed up the bed, his protruding stomach was starting to become a hassle. He turned facing the front of the bed and Rick sighed.

“That's very good and correct Negan.”

Negan leaked at light petting to his hole.

“Still you were very bad and you need to learn what's acceptable and what's not. Like say going home and not visiting for a month? That's a big no.”

Rick spread him open and he moaned out at cool air blowing against his hole. 

“Tell me you're sorry.”

Shivering at another blow of air he whispered. “I'm sorry I didn't visit.”

Negan cried out at a firm slap by hands.

“I don't believe that when you're moaning like a whore and whispering. You hardly got that out.”

“You're playing with my ass and expect me to respond normally?”

Rick smacked his ass hard with the belt.

“Ouch! What the hell Rick?”

“I also don't expect sass. Now tell me you're sorry and mean it.”

In the other bedroom Carol threw her pillow across the room. “Fuck hearing this shit! I'm making breakfast!” 

Rick looked at his closed door hearing another slam. Shrugging his shoulders he brought his attention back to Negan.

“Well Negan?”

“I'm sorry okay? You know I am. We put this aside last night.”

“Did we? Huh. I guess we did but still I need to wrap up some loose ends.”

His ass was kneaded. “I'm willing to put this whole silly thing behind me. You just got to take your licks first darling.”

A sharp hit stung his ass and he whined.

“I think thirty is good and we can call it even.” Rick smacked him again.

It should have been humiliating but he found himself trying to will his erection away.

“I'm going to need you to count with me.”

Negan moaned. “Why? Are you not having enough fun by yourself?”

Rick laughed darkly. “Why sugar I am but that mouth of yours is all sass. Keep it up and I can make it go up. Forty now for talking back.”

Rick spanked his ass five times on one cheek. “Come on Negan don't make it harder.”

The next swat was harder on his other cheek and his hole was massaged before harder smacks were delivered..

“Thirteen.” Negan gargled out.

“Good boy. See how easy that was?”

Negan's dick turned to steel as the swats   
alternated from hard and soft, cheek to cheek as he counted along. 

Rick only paused to rub his reddening ass or blow coolness onto it. Soft rubbing to his rim making him seep and he found himself counting to fifty when it finally stopped.

“Good boy.” Rick purred licking across his ear. “Sit tight and I'll get us breakfast,”

Negan resisted the urge to touch himself as he shivered over the ghost of Rick’s whispers. He hissed when he turned on his ass, it was sore.

Rick bounced down the stairs and saw Simon cooking breakfast..

“That's awfully nice of you Simon.”

Negan's friend didn't turn as he flipped ham supplied from Hill Top. “What would be nice is to not hear my bosses moans from upstairs.”

Rick smirked. “Jealous there?”

Simon grinned all teeth, cocking an eyebrow. “Yeah sure because I couldn't have tapped that years ago if I wanted to.”

Rick eyed the food seeing it was almost done. “Hmm maybe I should thank you that you didn't.”

Simon grinned pouring Rick and Negan two glasses of juice. “Negan he's strong. We've saved each other a lot but he's had it rough. You may think he's lived a life of luxury but it hasn't been easy.” Simon tapped his head. “He's still broken Rick. I think you're respectable but I'm not one hundred percent sold. You do him wrong, mess him up further and I'm going to be the one you answer to.”

Rick looked at him sharply tilting his head. “I get it. He's your friend but right now y'all have nothing and I have everything. If this was a game it would be one not worth playing.”

Simon grinned. “I know and I don't think you're playing but still he's my friend.”

Rick said nothing more and fixed a big plate. Simon volunteered to bring up their glasses but left them on the floor by their occupied room practically running away.

When he opened the door he saw Negan staring at his pink ass in the mirror.

“Like what you see?”

Negan gave an unimpressed look and hissed as he sat back against the headboard. He went to grab a fork but Rick hit his hand away.

“Calm down I got this.”

Negan gulped and watched Rick stab some eggs that were pushed to his mouth. He opened his mouth in understanding.

“So smart and pretty you are.”

Negan scoffed at the saccharine praise.

“You don't believe me?”

Negan scowled. “Stop that shit.”

Rick grabbed his chin and grinned. “Language and baby it's okay to let go.”

Negan had let go of a lot of things but something told him more would come.

Rick also ate but Negan could tell most was given to him and he rubbed his full stomach.

“I like that. How you touch your stomach.” Rick stroked his dick while watching.

Two pillows were fluffed and placed on top of one another. 

“Now I want you to prop that cute little ass on these pillows and let me see my damage.”

No thoughts of resistance entered his mind as he settled down onto the pillows. His face turned crimson as he realized how exposed he was and he panted, his face heating up.

Rick got up and returned with aloe and he dared not look back. A small moan escaped him at the cool substance hitting his tender flesh then Rick tugged his wet dick harshly.

“You know I didn't eat much just now.” Rick stated playfully, his fingers brushing gingerly over Negan’s hole. 

Negan hissed when his cheeks were kneaded and lube was drizzled down his crack. He didn't move as he was pried apart. 

‘This won't do.’ Rick thought.

Tugging once on his straining length he bent down and licked Negan's hole.

“You did...didn't.” Negan fought to speak coherently.

“Oh I did.” Rick came back with nonchalance.

A kiss landed between his legs and they vibrated unwillingly. Rick held his leg down and lapped again at his puckered flesh.

“Push out darling, let me see.”

A curse word formed in thinking but at another kiss, saliva depositing on his sensitive spot he moaned out clenching involuntarily. 

“That's right.” Rick groaned. 

Negan rasped out air and started to pump his ass back and forth. He smiled at Rick’s encouraging moans, his face hidden from sight.

“I like you doing that, squirming. I might have to give you a reward if you kept it up.” Rick praised when Negan stopped trying to chase his pleasure but instead withered at the deep plunges of Rick’s tongue. 

A flame of arousal ignited inside, his dick hard and leaking when Rick lapped at his hole repeatedly. Rick blew on him, he felt there was too much spit gathering and he shivered at the teasing.

“I swear Negan if I knew how good you looked under those jeans I would have knocked you up earlier.”

“I swear I didn't know how damn dirty you were.” Negan mumbled.

A finger forced its way into his walls plunging hard and pulling back to join with two. 

“Language Negan.”

He felt he could damn cry when Rick pulled out but then he was licked again and Negan exhaled when a tongue flattened around his rim and plunged in. 

There were no words for how good it felt having a warm and plush appendage drag across his insides and push spit in as Rick withdrew his tongue just to lick in deeper.

“Breath darling.” 

He swore Rick was licking his lips dramatically as he said it yet he had forgotten to breathe so he did so then.

“I've been taking a lot and I promised you a reward so what do you want?”

Negan's brain processed a series of scenarios trying to decide on one. The old him would want to fuck Rick good but he had changed, transformed into a needy little thing. 

Rick could just keep licking or he could blow him but then a gorgeous dick like Rick's should do bad things to him, specifically his ass.

“Whatcha thinking?” Rick taunted with a smirk.

Negan had made decisions all his life, hard ones that ended lives and easy ones to keep people safe but now he could not think of one word.

“Ummm.”

Rick slapped his ass. “It's okay baby I can help you decide.”

A tongue breached him again, gliding softly in and out. He was wet and sloppy inside by the time a tongue pulled back. Rick kissed his glistening hole then pushed in a finger gaining no resistance.

“Just how I needed it to be.”

Negan arched his ass higher in anticipation. It didn't matter if what came back to his ass was more tongue, fingers, or a dick.

Rick pushed both his pointer fingers in and spread them wide humming at the sight and Negan's squirming.

“I need you to stay still baby.”

Rick tugged at his length, dripping at Negan's reaction to him rubbing his ass.

“Come on Ricky.”

The name used to grate on his nerves but now it made him smile warmly.

“Hmm come on what? Time to go outside?”

‘This fucker is such a damn fucking tease! Am I supposed to just beg for a good fuck every time now?’ Negan thought.

Lube squirting out made him try to look back.

“No peeking!” Rick said with a hearty snack to his ass.

Slick hands rubbed at his ass, Rick's palm coating him thickly in substance. Rick started to get aggressive prying his cheeks apart and palming heavily af his ass.

“Damn Rick.”

At that four fingers pushed in and thrusted wildly. 

“Just say it and we can move on with it.”

Negan wanted to curse then say fuck it but he was so damn hard and he really wanted something in his ass. A whiny part of him wanted to say it was his reward and he shouldn't have to damn beg.

“What's it going to be Negan?” 

A finger slid across his prostate and just as quickly retreated.

“Please Rick just get me off.”

“That's all you had to say sugar,”

Mid eye roll at another sweet pet name on Rick's southern lips he shut up because something slid in his ass and it definitely wasn't a dick.

“Rick.”

An object slinked in further. It was bumpy on one side and smooth on the other and he moaned out at the roughness of uneven thrusts.

“Damn Negan if you could see what your ass could take. I knew there wouldn't be a problem.”

The item pushed in deeper, roughness glazing his prostate and brushing on it with no break. Negan cried out pumping his ass back to hit hard on whatever it was.

Rick jerked at the image of Negan's full ass trying to swallow it whole. It gave him an idea.

“Hold up.”

Negan stilled almost angry that he obeyed. Warm hands splayed across the dip of his back and he moaned at pushing.

Rick watched walls swallow the rest of Negan's prize. A black diameter hid around tight muscles clenching on. He nudged it smiling at Negan's whine.

“That's shoved up there pretty good, I can still see a little of it. Let's hope it comes out or Dr. Carson is going to see two things he's never seen before in his life.” Rick nudged on black. “You would have a lot of explaining to do and it wouldn't be too pretty a picture.” Rick slapped his ass hard. “For him anyway. Personally I'm enjoying the view.” Rick stroked his dick.

“Hmm I want you to cum fully loaded and touch free. Think you can do that for me honey?”

It was official, Rick was a dirty, crazy freak and Negan loved it.

“Gonna answer?” Rick slapped his ass.

“Yes Rick make me cum please!”

Rick tapped on the object embedded and then pushed on his rim making it pop out. 

“Well good news Negan we're not going to have to call the Doctor.”

The item jostled back and forth hard, dragging against his walls and it hurt. Half of it grabbing roughly and pulling at his insides, but Rick twisted it and smoothness glided against his sweet spot making him moan and thrust back maniacally.

“Work for it honey.”

Rick's voice left no kindness, it was demanding and the object jabbed deeper and too fast. Rick pet his sweaty thigh calmly, still harshly prodding the object deep within him. He could feel his walls turning red with a burn but it made him twitch and leak. 

It was strangled and weird when he cried out, his pinned dick spurting hard on a pillow. 

“Hold still.”

Rick pulled out whatever it was too firmly, his hole empty and aching in what seemed a second. He could hear Rick moaning, his dick making wet sounds as he jerked. Negan wished he could come again but breathed deeply tuckered out.

A wet gush coated his upper ass and back and how could it be that much? There was an abundance coating him. Rick moaned out before licking it up. Negan stayed still, his mind wondering what the fuck just happened.

“You okay?”

“Yeah I'm just too old for this shit.” Negan huffed.

“I'm not that far behind you, both our dicks seem fine though.”

Negan could only laugh at that.

“I want you to guess.”

“Guess what?” Negan sighed.

“Guess what I stuck up your ass.”

“I know it wasn't meant to go up there and you're a sick fuck. How did I ever end up ruling over you at all? You killed a lot of my men first, now I'm thinking you may have got creative with it.”

“I don't like killing Negan. I do enjoy ruining your ass though.”

Negan laughed again. “I see that. I give up. Tell me what it is because I'll never get it right.”

Rick threw the object down next to his head and yeah, he would have never guessed that.

“A tv remote? Really?”

“Well it's of no use these days, I thought it might be lonely.”

Negan slowly pulled pillows out from beneath him with Rick's help and rolled onto his back holding his stomach.

“I guess you were hungry too.” Negan’s dick made a valiant twitch thinking of Rick’s tongue up his ass. 

Rick laid by him and kissed him softly. “Yeah you do got a pretty sweet ass.”

Negan looked into piercing blue eyes staring at him intently. He felt a pull he knew was the same as with Lucille. Part of him wanted to fight it and part of him wanted to embrace it.

“I...I think I'm falling for you Ricky.” He let it go, a deep tension releasing with the admittance.

“Yeah Negan. I think I may have already beat you there.”

Negan put Rick's hand on his stomach relieved Rick felt the same. Love was always a hard thing for him, his childhood not easy but as Rick looked at him smiling widely he thought some gambles paid off and had the best rewards.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well did you see that being an remote? I need help. 😂


	12. New Friends

Alexandrian’s gawked as Rick carried Lucille and accompanied Negan back to his house. There were whispers and it was obvious Negan had a belly. Aaron who was usually more reserved had his eyes wide open and trained in Negan's protruding belly.

“Stop staring!”

At Rick's unusual screaming people moved on. Negan followed behind him but made a beeline for the couch and sat down panting. Rick propped Lucille up on the wall and kneeled in front of him.

“You okay?”

Negan touched his stomach. “Yeah I just tire so easily. It started about two weeks ago.”

“Maybe you need vitamins.”

“Yeah let's just give me whatever a pregnant chick would have and keep it moving.” Negan said with spite.

“Negan it's going to be okay.”

“Yeah I can do this.”

Rick saw his smile, the pretty one with just a trace of white teeth.

“Yeah we can do this.” Rick amended then kissed him. 

He pulled away hearing boots come down the stairs. Carl walked over and looked confused at Rick kneeling then took in Negan's stomach. He crossed his arms.

“Jesus told me he was here and fat.”

“I am not fat your twerp!”

“Carl!”

Carl let out s shallow laugh and pointed at his stomach. “What do you call that?”

“I expect you to respect Negan Carl.”

The teens smirk faded and he looked at his dad. “Why are you here anyway?”

“Carl sit down.”

Rick stood and sat on the coffee table and Negan shook his head in a plea. Rick ignored him.

“Negan and I need to talk to you.”

Carl sat down with an exaggerated sigh and Negan leaned back on the plush couch.

“Yeah that weather.” Negan attempted to change the subject.

Rick bit a smile and shook his head at Negan. ‘The truth.’ He mouthed out. Negan pouted and leaned back further.

“So Carl there is no easy way to ease into this. Negan is going to be staying here and he's going to be a part of our lives.”

“What the hell?”

“Respect Carl.”

“Why isn't he next door? Jesus said he was there last night.”

“Because we're together.”

Both Negan and Carl whipped their heads his way.

“What?” They both said in unison then turned to meet each other's eyes. Carl's eyes naturally zoomed down.

Rick took Negan's hand and gave him a kind smile squeezing his hand before looking at Carl seriously.

“I know this isn't easy to understand and you need time to process but you will not be rude to him and you won't play pranks.” Rick glared at him when saying the last part knowing he could be brutal with his pranks.

“Dad.”

“I know son and it's already a lot but there's more.”

Negan let out a sound making them both look at him. It was like a bandaid, it needed to be ripped off.

“Negan's pregnant and I'm the father.”

Carl stilled staring at their joined hands. “I...what?..I don't understand.”

Negan pitied him and didn't know what to do but exhale. “Kid we don't get it either but it's happening.”

“So you've been sleeping with him behind all our backs and this is the only way you would tell me you like him? Is this why you forgot about Michonne?”

Rick lets go of Negan and pinched the bridge of his nose. “No. Michonne and me never really got a start because of circumstances but Negan and I...we...he got pregnant the first time we...you know.”

Carl whispered out a “gross.”

“Things just changed after that.”

“So he's going to have this baby then leave us alone?”

“No Carl did I say that? I told you we were together. It's staying that way. I love him.”

Negan felt a warm and calm wave settle into his bones.

“What? How is that possible?”

Rick stood and patted Carl's head. “I've always heard that you can't choose who you love. Now I know it and if you give Negan a chance I think you will see he's not as bad as he led us to believe.” Rick winked at Negan.

“So what about The Sanctuary?”

“They’re dead kid.” Negan finally cut in.

“How?”

Rick put his finger to his lips in a hush motion. “It doesn't matter.”

“Well that's one piece of good news.” Carl decided. “Can I go to Enid's now?”

“Yeah Carl and talk to her about it, I want you to process this.”

His son nodded before leaving without another look Negan's way.

Negan sat there staring at his stomach.

“You okay?”

“Yeah.”

Rick wasn't convinced.

“You said you loved me and he hates me.”

Rick sat next to Negan and yanked him to his shoulder. “You were the enemy and now The Saviors are dead and we're together. Men don't have babies but here we are. It's a lot Negan, give it time.”

“Yeah I know.”

“I need to check on some things around here. I think you need to take a walk, get in some exercise then I'll come back and have lunch with you. How does that sound?”

“Great.”

Rick got up and gave him a kiss. It was a short one but felt extremely domestic to Negan before he walked out.

Negan decided he did need to get up and stretch his legs. Outside he could hear the birds chirping and it was sunny with a small breeze. Civilians continued to stare or run into their houses in fear as he passed. That is until he rounded a corner and saw Aaron depositing pine straw around a mailbox post like a homeowners association still existed.

“Pretty day out isn't it?”

Negan stilled and stared at Aaron's backside. The man turned then and smiled.

“Yeah it's um nice.”

Aaron looked down at his swollen stomach then smiled

“Rick told me and Eric you were staying for the long haul.”

“Eric?”

“My boyfriend?”

“Oh yeah I Remember him now.” It was a damn lie.

“Want to come in and have some lemonade?”

Negan walked to him then. “It depends. Is it poisoned?”

“I don't think Rick would appreciate that, his emotions read on his face like a book and right now it says you're here to stay and don’t mess with you or else.”

His other option was going home and being bored and lemonade was his favorite beverage.

“Sure Aaron lets have some lemonade.”

Inside the house looked more cozy than Rick's, homemade shit littering the walls and when he sat down on the couch even the pillows were cross stitched.

“Eric ran to the pantry but he will be back.”

“It's a nice set up you have here. Homey.” Negan only cringed a little internally at his make for peaceful talk.

Aaron made a scoffing laugh before stepping into the kitchen. He came back quickly with cookies and a glass of lemonade. “Maybe I should lie about all my bloody kills and make better conversation but if you want to make friends with Eric tell him you love the look because it's all his doing. Just be prepared for a two hour conversation about crafts.”

Negan took a sip of his drink not sure what to say or how to proceed. It was the best lemonade he had in years and he looked at the glass perplexed.

“Simple syrup. The nectar of the Gods.” Aaron explained.

\-------------------------------------------------

Eric got held up helping Mr. Williams move his couch and he whistled on his way home hoping maybe him and Aaron could have a quickie before lunch.

He opened the door to laughter and walked in to see Negan holding his stomach and drinking lemonade. He opened his mouth and closed it only to open it again.

“Eric you're going to catch flies in your mouth.”

Eric sat by his boyfriend worrying he might be a hostage.

“I was just telling Negan about our first date and how you spilled water down your pants and it looked like you pissed yourself.”

Negan leaned over and got a cookie. He was livid Aaron shared a treat made with his grandma's recipe with the devil himself nonetheless.

“These are delicious Eric. You are a fine cook. Maybe we could have a cooking battle one day.”

Eric could see Negan was serious and he smiled picking up his own cookie because with Negan's fast paced chewing soon they would be out.

“So I can't help but notice you have packed on some pounds.”

“Eric!” Aaron scolded, he didn't know how many times he had to tell him to be more polite.

Negan put down his cookie and looked at his bump and then looked to Eric who looked curious then Aaron who blushed.

“People gain weight all the time and it's rarer now but still that's your business. I apologize for my boyfriend's rude behavior. It seems it's something I will continuously be doing until death does us part.”

Negan knew he couldn't keep it a secret forever and Aaron had been nice. Eric was being an ass but he couldn't have possibly known what's really going on.

“Well.” Negan looked at both of them and started to turn his own shade of pink so he took a sip of his lemonade. “I'm pregnant. Surprise!”

Eric spat out his drink, a hue of yellow hitting the floor and then a glass shattered to the floor from Aaron's hand.

“Shit!” Aaron barked out. “I should clean this up.”

“I'll help you.” Eric practically ran to the kitchen door.

Negan sat as too much silence came from the kitchen.

“He's got to be kidding.”

“With a gut like that it's got to be true. There's a baby in there.” Eric reasoned.

“But how?”

“Naturally Rick fucked him.” Eric whispered.

“Naturally? Negan is pregnant? Naturally?” It was said with a judging hiss.

“Don't shoot the messenger.”

“He knows we're talking about him.” Aaron felt bad for Negan.

“We should go back and act normal.” Eric suggested.

Aaron didn't know how to act normal after that news but Eric took his hand.

Negan sat there with a fresh cookie and didn't look up as he stuffed half of it in his mouth. “I'm not fat.”

He sounded hurt and Aaron didn't know how to help.

“Of course you're not! The baby has to grow is all.” Eric explained. “Lucky for you I had some free time after breaking my ankle.”

Eric ran off and the other two stared, Aaron gave Negan an awkward smile and soon Eric returned with two blankets, a pink and a blue one.

“I crochet, my grandmother taught me.”

Two blankets were given to Negan and he touched them delicately before bawling. “I...I haven't gotten any baby gifts yet.”

Aaron's eyes bugged out as Negan cried freely, tears smearing across his red face.

“Well take them both sweetie. You can bring one back after you see what you have.”

Aaron felt better about the situation and gave Negan a tissue that he blew into noisily.

“Rick thinks it's a girl because I feel it. I can't explain it but I feel it's a girl.”

Eric nooded. “Well I'll keep this blue one here just in case but it seems you won't need it.”

Negan nodded calming down then. “Thanks. It means a lot and you two are the first people I've really told. I mean Rick obviously knows and we told Carl today. More like Rick told him but everyone else kinda found out by necessity.”

“We are proud to hear the happy news. We can't wait to meet her.” Eric sighed dreamily.

Aaron looked at his sweet man, now that's why he kept him around.

The conversations got easier from that point and Eric saw that Negan had a soft side and he complimented his sewing! He watched how Negan grabbed his glass of lemonade and saw his pink tongue dart out to wipe crumbs away from his lips and he was practically married but he crossed his legs seeing now why Rick had to get a piece and evidently kept coming back for more.

The talk ranged from light to Aaron squeezing Negan's hand when he admitted his fear that his girl might die in birth but most of it involved humor, colorful euphemisms yelled out by Negan and spurred on by Aaron. The talk had just taken a sexual tone and Aaron was going to ask if Rick was good in bed because he figured he was but also for some reason thought maybe he wasn't. The thought ended when the door burst open and heavy hurried boots ran to them.

“Negan.” Rick had had his hands on his hips and looked equal parts angry and concerned.

“Hey Rick.”

“I didn't know where you were. We were supposed to have lunch and I came home looking for you and I've been running around the past hour looking for you.” Rick seethed, disappointment dripping.

“I'm sorry.” Negan looked at the clock. “I lost count of time and we were talking.”

Rick looked at them then and grinned though it was fake. He wiped sweat from his brow and sighed in agitation.

“I'm sorry I worried you.” Negan said shyly.

Rick turned his back to his friends and Aaron expected more anger. He didn't expect Negan's glass to be picked up.

“Was it good?” Rick took his own sip of the yellow liquid.

“Yeah.”

“That's good with it being your favorite.”

They saw kind hands hold Negan's cheek. “Ready for lunch? I was going to make you something but we will have to do sandwiches because I'm behind now.”

“That's fine Ricky.”

“Come on then.” Rick helped him up pulling on the much larger man with ease.

Eric and Aaron led them to the door and only then did Rick acknowledge them again. “Thanks for keeping him company, it's good for him to get out.”

Eric muttered a “no problem” as Aaron nodded an agreement and they watched the two walk too closely side by side. When Negan grabbed Rick’s hand their leader took it and came in closer to his side.

Eric grinned releasing a content exhale. “That right there is love babe. I would know.”

Aaron kissed him pushing him in the door harshly and he knew that quickie was going to happen right now. “Yeah that's love alright.” Aaron agreed as he smothered Eric's face in too many kisses.


	13. Home

“I should spank your ass raw.” Rick growled, pinning Negan to the wall and kissing him aggressively. Negan moaned at sharp nibbles to his bottom lip. 

“Then do it.” Negan moaned pushing his baby bump into Rick’s chest

Negan was already hard in his pants and grabbed Rick’s face to pull him in for another kiss.

“You need to eat.”

He pouted at that, food the last thing on his mind.

“I had half a plate of cookies and two glasses of lemonade.”

“I think you need worse than a spanking after eating all that sugar.”

He was rock hard and wanted Rick to take him right then but if Carl or anyone else saw an eyeful it would be bad.

Taking the other’s hand he went up the stairs as fast as his body allowed. Rick slammed their door shut and cocked his head when Negan pushed his ass out, his palms firmly planted on the wall. 

“You gonna do it?”

The sight was delicious and Rick grabbed at his clothed crotch. Walking up behind Negan he kissed his neck tenderly before tracing his pointer finger down a warm back and stopping at the start of the others ass.

“I don't know Negan it seems that’s what you want and how can you learn your lesson about not letting me know where you were if you want it?”

Negan’s dick twitched when fingers swept lightly at his cheeks, Four fingers glided into his cheeks rubbing but not breaching him.

“Baby please don’t tease me.”

He gasped at a sharp slap to his ass.

“Baby? Do I look like a guy that likes being called baby?”

Negan pushed back moaning.

“Fine. Don't tease me asshole.”

Rick slapped the same ass cheek again and pinched a handful of meat.

“Watch it. Keep it up and I’m going to tie you to that chair and cum all over you multiple times and neglect that pretty little cock and nice ass of yours.”

“You wouldn’t.” 

Rick slid his hand between Negan’s leg edging towards his cock but not close enough. 

“I would. You know that.”

Bucking back Negan moaned and damn it if Rick’s hand didn’t stay in the same spot.

“Please Rick.”

A wet kiss landed between his shoulders and he was rubbed closer to his front. “Well how am I supposed to say no when you beg?”

Turning then Negan grabbed Rick’s face and looked into his blue eyes. Once all he wanted was to fuck him but now he wanted him in every way.

“What’s your favorite color?” Negan asked pressing his forehead against Ricks.

The question surprised Rick and he leaned his chin in closer. “What?”

“I just want to know you.” Negan admitted. “What’s your favorite color?”

“Green. Yours?”

“Blue. The same shade as your eyes.”

He half expected to be shoved against the bed and the other part thought he may have just fucked up. Instead Rick smirked.

“Wow Negan something tells me those words are true for me but for any other person it would be a lie.”

Rick kissed Negan and he anticipated harsh teeth but it was sweet, Rick’s tongue gliding soft and slow against his. 

“I might not tie you up.” Rick told him between soft pecks.

Rick pushed him to the bed and onto his back. He leaked watching lube being coated on thick fingers. Negan scrunched up his eyes at a finger pushing in and opened them up when Rick inserted another finger and stroked his dick.

“Rick.” Negan puffed out and Rick smiled as he pulled his fingers out and rubbed circles around his taint.

“Like that baby?”

It shouldn’t have sounded better to Negan’s ears but he liked it more when Rick was saying it to him.

Fingers pushed in again shallowly stretching him out unhurried. Rick gazed at him longer before inspecting a widened hole.

“I like seeing you swallow my fingers down.”

As it was said Rick thrusted all three deeper and moved them back and forth, wet slurps filled the air as he was stroked slowly.

Negan whined at sudden emptiness.

“Shh.” Rick whispered depositing more lube on his digits and pressing in again.

He leaned down and kissed Negan scissoring him open.

“You ready?”

Everything had been on Rick’s terms, slamming and biting but now he was asked it he was ready.

“Yeah.”

Pads brushed across his stomach teasingly petting at his treasure trail and he leaked when his legs were pulled apart and Rick pressed in his tip pulling back and pressing in more.

“Damn.” Negan moaned out at the burn to his walls.

“You and your filthy mouth.”

Rick pushed in harder but stopped and rubbed circles at his rounded belly and Negan’s legs shook at too much as Rick sank in fully and stilled. They both panted sharing breaths and Rick met him when he leaned in for a kiss. He moaned on Rick’s tongue, a dick thrusting slowly back and forth.

“Shit you’re too much.” Rick said between a kiss.

His dick was stroked slowly, fingers carded through his black hair, piercing blues watching his every reaction. It occurred to him then Rick was making love to him not fucking him and a mouth latched on to his neck sucking and lapping.

When a hand swirled at his slit he hollered out painting Rick’s palm. Rick kissed him once and licked a slow trail up his flesh making Negan moan out, his dick twitching.

“Come on me.” Negan patted his stomach.

“Yeah?”

Negan nodded and Rick pulled out and fondled his balls, Negan ran a pointer up his shaft enjoying Rick’s moan. Crooking his fingers in an order Rick came closer and their eyes stayed locked while Negan jerked him quicker. Hot seed spurted on his stomach and Rick’s eyes rolled back as he emptied.

When Rick opened them Negan linked their hands and Rick settled in beside him.

“Maybe I’ll let you have a go at me one day.”

Rick played with his cum tracing through it on Negan's stomach and Negan found he didn’t like the idea. It was better this way, Rick’s dick plowing into him, most times too hard and fast. Demanding. No he liked Rick in control now.

“I don’t want to be alone anymore.” It spilled out and Negan thought of Lucille and what a shitty husband he was and how he couldn’t give her a child or a life she deserved and he knew he deserved nothing and admitted to himself long ago that was justified but now Rick was here.

“You’re not.”

Negan’s wet eyes met Rick’s and adoration shined through a blur of tears.

“We’re a family now Negan. Sugar bugs going to have two dads that love her and a brother and a slew of honorary aunts and uncles. They too will see that you’re not so bad.”

“My wife. I didn’t deserve her.”

He opened his mouth to say he didn’t deserve Rick either but he was pinned down by Rick’s scrawny body.

“Yeah Negan you deserved her like I deserved Lori and her me. It wasn’t a perfect marriage but we fit and had good times. You and me? We’re going to say awful shit to each other too but at the end of the day it’s not going to matter because we will let it go and sleep in this bed together every night. I promise.”

Since the walkers roamed Negan had not gotten a single damn promise and he shuddered at a light kiss and Rick pulling him to his body. 

Home. Negan huffed out in relief. He finally had a home.


	14. Another Reveal

Rick held Negan close as he slept. The man meant so much to him now and he saw suffering that he couldn’t notice before. Rick thought of Carl and Judith who wasn’t his blood but his in every way. It wasn’t the first time he was thankful to still have family but it didn't sting as much when he thought of Daryl, Michonne, Carol who had no kin left but it affected him deeply thinking of it from Negan’s view. Being a monster was easier to achieve when hurt.

Dressing Rick padded downstairs to make them both a sandwich and some fruit. 

“Hey Carl.”

His son sat eating his own sandwich and guilt briefly came to him knowing his son made his own food like everyday while Negan and him had sex upstairs.

“I can’t believe you're letting him stay!””

“Am I supposed to let your sister die in his belly in the woods?” 

“Sister?”

“We think it’s a girl.”

“How?”

“Carl it’s an intuition. I know you don’t like him but I expect respect and you need to know that I would never let my child go. You know this already.”

“What if he takes her from you?”

“And goes where? Besides we’re together.”

Carl grimaced and stood up angrily as he threw his food away.

“Don’t be wasteful.”

“I lost my appetite.”

Carl brushed by him quickly but Rick grabbed his wrist. “I’m not going to make it hard on you. Be all over you when you’re adjusting but I want you to know I love you and I loved your mom, still do.”

Carl’s face softened and he looked like the child he was. “I know Dad that you love us.”

He was allowed one brief hug before Carl went to the door. “But I still don’t like him.” His son spat and closed the door.

It went better than he imagined and he made two honey and peanut butter sandwiches amazed The Kingdom had beekeepers. He sliced an apple and headed upstairs to Negan grinning as he thought of seeing the others' sleeping face.

Opening the door he saw Negan in bed rubbing his back and ass. It was a pretty sight despite Negan’s tight face. 

“You okay?”

“You’re rough with the merchandise.”

“I was nice today.”

“Tell that to my aching ass!”

Rick put the food down and dragged a finger down Negan’s side. “Lay on your stomach.”

Negan laughed as he tried to turn with a large belly.

“I’m already a whole house.” Negan complained.

“Shush.” 

Rick slapped his ass then rubbed it out kneading deep.

“Shit Ricky.” Negan moaned at the deep massage that started to work up his lower back where he hurt most. Hands cupped his neck and Rick hissed.

“You are sore, your necks tense.”

Negan moaned out almost falling asleep at too heavy of hands for a smaller man. He almost bucked off the bed when Rick touched a scar on his hip.

Rick was perplexed when Negan gathered the sheet and hid his naked body edging closer to the corner of the mattress.

“Negan?”

Second hands were loud, ticking on a clock where Negan refused to look up. He shut down and Rick didn’t know what to say.

“Hey Negan.”

He touched Negan's foot and he cried out like he hit him.

“Don’t touch me.”

Negan sounded wounded and he sat staring at the bed and Rick didn’t know what he did wrong.

“Hey Negan talk to me.”

The man huddled closer in his corner refusing to acknowledge him. When he tried to touch him again he shivered and backed further into the corner.

“Just leave me alone.” Negan whispered after more minutes ticked by.

“Ok but please eat.”

Rick looked back once at a shell shocked Negan and decided if he couldn't help he would work hard instead.

Negan sat there yelling at himself in his head for acting that way. He always built up at wall, made himself this tough man who didn’t take shit. Rarely did he look in the mirror and let himself remember what he really was but with Rick he didn’t have to be the strong asshole or the leader in charge. He could just be himself even though he still lied about how he felt. Of course he let his guard down and Rick touched it, reminding him who he was. Negan fucked his wives and never got close intentionally and with Rick he loved him.

Rick paused to take a drink of water and wipe sweat from his brow. It was morbid to dig a grave before a body but when anybody had free time they started one incase when that bad day came time was rushed. Now he was digging grave two enjoying the burn of muscles to forget whatever was going on with Negan. His boyfriend, he scowled at the term because it felt weird though he loved Negan who was a melting pot of emotions but this was different.

“Two plots? Let’s hope we don’t need them.”

“Hey Michonne.”

“You’ve been avoiding me.”

“Yeah I’m not ready for the talk.”

“The I’m sleeping with the enemy talk?”

Rick should have figured she knew. He laughed at what more was going on, him with Negan was only part of it. “Yeah among other things.”

“Like?” Michonne sat on the grass looking up at him in anticipation.

“I’m in a shit mood as it is. I don’t think disappointing you will make it better.”

“We’ve always been friends Rick.” She stated simply.

“I’ve been messing things up as it is and something is up with Negan.”

“We don’t have to talk about what you’re hiding. You can tell me what happened to make you almost pass out digging.”

Rick sat beside her drinking more water. “I wasn’t about to pass out but I am upset.”

“Do tell.”

Rick pinched the bridge of his nose thinking it better not to say he was giving Negan a massage. “I don’t know. I brought him lunch and I touched this scar he had and then he was pulling away and looking scared and he wouldn’t even look at me. It was like I punched him or something and when I tried to touch him again he freaked.”

“Sounds like touching his scar was the root of the problem.” Michonne determined.

“Yeah but I figured it was from a fall or failed assassination attempt.”

“It’s obviously something sensitive to him. Maybe a wife cut him or he almost died out there. It’s easy to tell he’s a repressed man who thinks talking out feelings is bad and hurting others is fun.”

“Its so stupid. We’re building a life together and Carl knows about us. He should know he can tell me anything and he freaked out like I was going to hurt him.”

“You got to confront him Rick. Talk it out. That’s the only option and maybe he’s never had a real relationship before so that makes it harder.”

“He’s been married before all this.”

Michonne’s eyes bugged out. She couldn’t imagine the evil man being a doting husband, maybe abusive. If she voiced her thoughts Rick would defend him, she said nothing but laughed at the ridiculous notion of Negan and real marriage. 

“Lucille. He named that damn bat after her.”

“He’s crazy!” Michonne spat in disgust.

“He was hurt. Losing her. You told me yourself you kept those walkers on chains that were your boyfriend and his best friend. We’re not above crazy. I talked on a dead phone and saw my wife.”

“Touché.” Michonne was now looking at it from a different angle. “Do you love him?” 

It was hard to confess that to Michonne, at one time he wanted with her what he was now having with Negan. “Yeah I do.”

A beautiful smile burst on her face that he rarely saw. “Good. We all deserve a little happiness.”

“We do and I’m having a baby.”

Michonne hit his arm hard and damn it hurt. “Ouch what the hell?”

“You cheated on him? I mean this thing had to last longer than since he’s moved here and I can’t believe you would do that Rick! I expected better from you!”

She yelled at him too fast and angrily and then punched his arm again and he never expected her to care about Negan being honored.

He rubbed his arm. “Michonne no! I didn’t cheat.”

“Yeah right!” 

She went to hit him again but he moved away. When he went to stand she was right behind him ready to push him down.

“He’s pregnant okay!” Rick yelled as he grabbed her so she couldn’t assault him again.

“He? As in Negan?”

“Yeah. I don't know how it’s possible and he’s done his fair share of fearing it but we’re figuring it’s going to be okay.

“Did you find a stash of drugs?”

“Think about it, he’s hormonal and has gained weight.”

Michonne shook her head. “Simon did take all the oreos on his last run here and said it was Negan’s orders. I’m not going to lie. I was pissed.

Rick chuckled and Michonne wrapped him in a hug and he held on tightly. “If things were different. You and I may have worked out but Negana lot more than you all see.”

“I’m sure.” Michonne whispered as she let go. “Now I got to find cute baby clothes

“For a girl. He thinks he knows but I have a more urgent request first.”

Rick beamed as he arrived home sure that Michonne and a few crew would find an ultrasound machine but then he frowned remembering Negan’s outburst this afternoon.

He took a shower soaping down good and thinking he needed his own massage to remedy the emotional whiplash Negan was giving him. “Damn.” He muttered realizing he took no clothes with him to the bathroom so he wrapped a towel around himself and prepared to see tears or an object thrown in his face.

“Damn ain’t you a sight for sore eyes?” Negan purred. 

He was laying in bed reading but got up and traced a finger up Rick’s wet abs. A pink tongue darted out to lick it away with a smirk.

“I guess I should undress.” Negan said an octave lower.

Rick gulped when Negan dropped his jeans exposing his thick length obviously forgetting boxers after he left. The shaft before him was tugged on hard and quick along with a needy moan escaping plump lips.

“I’ve been wanting you all day.” Negan said with a thrust.

Rick opened his mouth for a kiss that was soft but deep. Negan pulled back to lick a stripe up his neck and then practically ran to the drawer before planting his arms on the bed and pulsing his ass to show off his sweet little hole that was still slightly gaped from their earlier escapade. Rick licked his dry lips when Negan drizzled some slick onto his opened cheeks.

“Am I prepping or you?” Negan moaned out.

Rick dropped his towel and stroked his hard cock and Negan made the slutiest whine when he touched his wet hole. His dick leaked and twitched when Negan pushed out, begging his finger to enter. 

Rick looked at the bed then shook his head as he squeezed the base of his dick. Negan was a conniving little bastard and it had been working. He slapped the welcoming asscheek before him and Negan moaned out.

“You smart little dick!” He fussed with another slap.

“I wouldn’t call anything on me little.”

Rick spanked his ass again. “This your plan huh? Distract me with that slutty ass of yours? Make me forget?”

Negan closed his eyes, sighing, he dug his nails into his palms. He couldn’t do anything right these days.

“Answer me.”

When Negan didn’t reply Rick squeezed his cheeks. “Negan I want to know what I did wrong. I can’t fix it if I don’t know.”

Negan didn’t want to explain so he stayed mute. He did sigh when a finger pressed against his hole and pet his inner cheeks. He lied so long, even to Lucille. She didn’t know the truth and telling Rick felt like betrayal. He loved both of them in different ways but it was getting harder to call it equal in his heart.

“I’m here for you.”

It was said so sweet and a hand massaged his lower back that still hurt and another teased at his hole.

“Fuck me please.”

The fingers at his hole halted but the other hand still rubbed his back.

“I can’t. You’re running Negan and I can’t help you do that.”

“I never told Lucille and I’m supposed to tell you?”

“Yeah because I inadvertently hurt you today and I never want to do that again and I’m thinking Lucille never got that reaction out of you and if she did she would have demanded the truth too.”

She hadn’t witnessed him like that because he used to always be one step ahead. He lied to her but with Rick he was always turned upside down on a whim.

“Negan you can tell me anythang.” It was said sultry and low and his hole was rubbed at again in slow circles and he leaked on sheets when Rick spread two fingers out and rubbed on each side of his rim.

He hadn’t admitted it since he was fifteen and got away, for years he was affected and he contemplated therapy but it was too hard. Developing a flashy persona helped and he started to curse, be brash so he stood out in college with his aviator sunglasses and leather jacket. Suddenly all the women wanted him and the men envied him and he became that lie. He still was now. Cursing and all.

“Just tell me and you will see I won’t judge and it won’t be bad and then we can go back to this.” Rick stuck the tip of his digit in and Negan pushed back exhaling when the finger pressed in fully. He could say it now, his back turned with Rick’s finger in him deep.

“I was um…”

Fuck! Rick pulled out and walked around the bed and crawled across it to meet Negan and he closed his eyes. He couldn’t do this.

“Negan.”

Rick held his head with both hands and pecked his lips and he opened them a sliver to see blue peering at him. He closed them again when fingers carded through his hair and scratched, Rick’s warm breath ghosted on his lips. Negan needed Rick more than water, he healed him in so many ways. Saw his good and accepted his bad.

“It’s okay Negan. I love you. You don’t have to tell me if it’s this hard. I expect you to come to me if it starts to eat at you though.”

It was exactly why he had to admit it. 

“My parents abused me. They got off on it and they almost killed me one day.”

Rick would look at him with pity or disdain but he had to open his eyes and see Rick. 

He saw eyes furrowed at his pain but not pity nor anger at him not being to get past it.

“Oh baby and look how far you came. Fuck them, they couldn’t even tear you down.”

Rick kissed him in a series of light pecks and the loud thudding he didn’t even realize was in his head dissolved instantly as Rick pet his hair. He could only shudder at the lick to his ear. What should have felt heartbreaking in that moment felt beautiful instead. He realized Rick had replaced Lucille, that love did vary person to person. ‘Rick meant more’ his heart sang out a steady even beat.


	15. Everything Really is Okay

Daryl wiped the sweat from his cheek pushing the sonogram machine out of the van, he didn’t get why it was needed but they found one. It had been a creepy run with Joseph staring at him, no telling what that was about but he didn’t trust him. Three Saviors still alive were three too many. 

Joseph and Daryl maneuvered the machine down and he pulled a smoke out offering one to the large man, any other time he wouldn’t share but a bitter had gotten too close and the man took care of it. 

“No uh no thanks.”

Joseph had a pink flush surely from the heat of the day and all the heavy lifting they did. 

“So is it Joey or Joseph?”

‘Oh God he’s staring at me and he offered me a smoke? Does that mean something or is he just being nice? Nobody really looks at me when they talk, maybe he’s interested. No, he’s just being nice.’ Joey rambled in his brain.

“Hey.” Daryl snapped his fingers in front of his face. “I asked a question.”

“Well my birth certificate said Joseph and my mother called me that but some friends called me Joey and Negan and the crew they um called me Fat Joey.”

“So what do you want to be called? And Negan's’ an asshole.”

“Umm. Joseph's fine and he’s not that bad.”

Daryl scoffed, smoke escaping from his mouth. “Yeah sure and it’s got nothing to do with him being in charge and being able to murder you at one wrong move.”

“There were times I feared for my life with him usually when I did wrong but nice leaders are hard to find now and he gave me more than my last group.”

Daryl just nodded seemingly done with chatting. He put his cigarette out and Joseph watched him lean down and get a box. His ass was so nice hugging those brown jeans. “Joseph it’s time to unload again.”

“Right.” He just needed to get himself together.  
——-  
“Who did that?” Negan touched Rick’s bruised arm, it was large and brown. Rick continued to wash his stomach with a loofah making large circles around his rounding belly.

“Michonne, she was upset when I told her you were pregnant.”

“You what? She hates me.”

“I got bruises that say otherwise. When I said someone was pregnant she assumed it was a woman of course, that I cheated on you. She tried to push me down, I would probably be punched in the face if I didn’t stop her.”

“She still hates me.”

Rick washed his legs laughing at how things have changed.

When they got out Negan looked at his own littering bruises and touched his stomach. 

“She’s okay Negan.”

Nodding his head Negan turned, his eyes wet with unshed tears. Rick held him when he crashed into him hugging him harder when his breathing turned ragged.

“She is okay alright? She’s fine, growing in that big stomach of yours.” Rick reassured him 

Walking out undried and pitiful Negan sat on the bed and went to crawl under the covers. 

“Oh no we’re not doing that, I’m drying you off and we’re dressing to go for a walk.”

“I don’t want to walk.”

“It’s good for the baby and you and it’s nice out. You can’t keep lying in bed.”

“I can do whatever the fuck I want to!”

“Negan.”

“You always do that shit! Say my name with that tone, I'm a grown fucking man!”

“Whose acting like he’s a baby instead of carrying one.”

“Fuck you Rick!”

Rick turned and got a towel and started to dry Negan off touching his baby bump then caressing his cheek, kissing Negan soft and slow. “Everything's fine.”

“Yeah I know.” Negan lied and Rick heard the uncertainty there.  
———————————————————————  
They were strolling down another block when Negan saw Daryl in a truck lifting up a box that was then handed to Joey on the ground. A laugh much needed riled up inside him as he stopped walking.

“What's so funny?” Rick didn’t see anything comedic in what they were doing.

“Joseph’s checking Daryl out.”

“What?”

“I hardly know shit about Joseph other than he’s smart but I know when a man likes another’s ass, it's like you when I came for pickup.”

“I didn’t even like you then, you were just so adamant you were going to screw me so I had to show you, it was hate sex.”

“Hate sex isn’t always purely hate.”

“I didn’t see you that way.”

“Yeah sure Ricky.” Negan sped up again going to greet Joseph.

“Hey boss.”

“Joseph I’m hardly your boss with everything that's happened.”

“You saved me from Kane. I know we’re on more equal ground now but you will always be my boss.” There was affection there, Negan had saved him from his former leader a real bad man who raped the women and worked the men hard, killed a man weekly just to remind them he was in charge.

“You're not so bad Joseph.”

Rick had caught up then and Daryl saw a stupid grin of his face when he arrived back, he could see now that Rick was with Negan. “I got the sonogram machine. Why do we need one?”

Rick pinched between his eyes and smiled at his friend. “I’ll explain it later but that's great news.”

Negan started towards the deemed infirmary with Rick hot on his heels. “Trying to tell the whole town you’re pregnant?” Rick hushed yelled. 

“I got to know she’s okay and everyone else is going to know soon enough at this rate.”

They hurried up and Dr. Carson was inventorying new medicine that was found on the run. “Morning boys.”

“You got the machine, I need to know.”

“I knew you would be here fast, it’s already plugged up and ready to go.”

Negan pulled off his shirt and rushed to the exam table pulling his jeans down and grabbed the gel to smooth over his stomach. Dr. Carson smiled at his eagerness but knew the man was worried. Pressing the device over Negan’s stomach he saw growth. “The baby’s growing, bigger than our last check. They’re fine.”

“She could still be in there even if she’s not alive.”

“Our baby is alive, we can check the heartbeat now Negan. I think things were behind with you being male but.” He pressed the sound on and Negan looked at the image.

“Oh my God.”

Rick held Negan's hand looking at their child. “Look at her, she’s healthy.”

“Yeah.” Negan cried out, relief washing everything else away. 

“The heartbeat is strong, very healthy. I’ll leave you two alone.” Dr. Carson felt uncomfortable knowing Negan saw him crying this time and they needed to process the good news. 

“By the way we will be able to tell probably soon if it’s really a girl.” With that he was gone.

“I told you.”

“You were lying Rick so I would calm down. I get it but I still needed to know because you were fucking lying.”

“Shh.” Rick kissed him, a few tears starting himself and Negan didn’t stop his own, settling back to listen to the steady beat of his daughter’s heart. 

“We made her.”

“We did and thank you for carrying her.”

The words made Negan sniffle more, like he chose this. It was so scary back then thinking about it but now he knew she would live, that he would be able to carry her to term, that Dr. Carson would deliver her with no problem.

That night Rick held Negan in his arms, rubbing him softly and whispering in his ears.

“So I like the name Lisa or Charlotte what do you think?” Rick asked.

Charlotte sounded fine and he hadn’t thought of it much until now but he nuzzled closer. 

“Charlotte's okay but I like Jasmine.” Negan suggested.

Rick laughed. “You've been talking to Judith much? She loves the Disney princesses, Carl’s taught her all about them.” 

Negan looked at his nails and sighed out. “I just liked the name.”

“You're shit at name picking but we will come up with something.” Negan refused to let it burn him. Rick didn’t know why he really liked the name and it didn’t matter anyway. A name was just a name.

“Maybe I'll let you just pick it.” Growing up he hated his own name and didn’t embrace it until college.

“No we will do it together.” Rick kissed him pushing into him and kissed his pregnancy. He liked the sound of that, doing everything together with Rick.

He pushed the resentment away, burying it like he did all things that really mattered to him.


	16. Jasmine was Her Name

That morning Negan woke to a sharp pain in his back, he grunted and turned his head to Rick who was sleeping like an angel, the thought of hitting his stupid face awake nagged at him but he grumbled and got up, a rational part of himself said not to blame Rick for knocking him up but then he said fuck. He held his stomach as he sat peeing down because he was lazy and his aim had been off lately with his ever expanding belly. He shouldn’t be mad at all because his girl was safe and healthy.

He looked at his feet, they were swollen and he pressed them against the floor, the increased pain actually making them feel better and he stood then. 

“Fuck.” He cursed because he wasn’t actually done so he sat and stared at some weird ass painting in the restroom that didn’t seem like it really belonged there as he gave his bladder time to decide it was done.

Curling back into bed he touched Rick’s face and smiled, he was beautiful and kind, he was lucky to have him and closed his eyes again only a slight issue nagging at him but not enough to keep him awake.

Rick woke that morning to see Negan’s hand placed on his stomach as he inhaled deeply, a light sheen of sweat was across his face but otherwise he looked comfortable. ‘I want to marry him.’ He thought then shook his head not sure where that came from. Negan and even he had issues and they were compatible as is but marriage wasn’t something to be rushed.

Pulling up the pregnant man's shirt he rubbed his stomach and felt a kick. More names ran through his head, seeing Negan’s treasure trail stretch down to his pajama bottom and his growing stomach made him hard in his own boxers, he pulled his dick out and stroked it moaning out at the image of a sleeping Negan.

He wanted him but knew the week had been stressful and Negan sleeping was more important. Still the visual wasn’t enough so he slipped Negan’s pants down feeling only a bit guilty at the slight absence of consent. Negan's dick was soft but large and he touched it once then rubbed his own precum along his aching slit and panted.

Negan heard wet strokes and coming to his senses wondered why the sound he always connected with pleasure was not from him, his dick wasn’t being pumped and he cracked an eye. “Well look at you.”

Rick turned pink but didn't slow down and leaned over to kiss him. “Sorry I just saw you sleeping and it turned me on but I didn’t want to wake you.”

Turning Negan grabbed his hands and took over stroking his cock and kissed him. “You should have.”

Rick grunted in understanding and rubbed Negan’s stomach, they had been getting more intimate and for so long he denied that even with his wives but found he didn't want to deny anything he had with Rick.

Coming closer Rick kissed him again and took his dick back to drag it across the side of Negan’s bulging belly. “You into that kinky shit Rick?”

“Nothing wrong with admiring a body carrying my child.” Rick moaned out and rubbed his slit across Negan’s flesh depositing precum on tan skin.

Negan couldn't see over his stomach but felt cool air and touched himself finding his dick exposed. “You've been playing with me when I’m asleep?”

“Just touching.” Rick admitted easily and bounced his balls

“Want you in me now.” Negan stocked his hardening dick and stood to strip. Rick followed suit and crawled back onto the bed just to see Negan fish out lube and get on his knees.

“Maybe you should be on your back.” It seemed too much like the first time, when everything was hurried and brute but Negan shook his head.

“Easier like this, Feel like sugar bug is closing off my asshole these days.”

Swatting his ass at the unsexy visual Rick took the lube from Negan and thrusted a finger in. Negan seeped instantly and pushed back and forth on the one digit, his ass taking it like a beg for more so he slipped another slicked finger in feeling plush walls accommodate him. Negan’s legs stretched out further and he moaned pushing back.

“Rick more please.”

It was faster than usual but Rick pushed another digit in and scissored his walls pushing all three in and out hastily in unison. A wet patch of darkness formed beneath Negan on the sheets and he pushed back and forth clenching down on the breached digits.

Testing the waters Rick pushed another in and gawked at Negan swallowing him whole and watched him almost fall down as he tried to pump his straining dick. “Shhh I got you.” Rick whispered and stroked his hanging dick as he pushed in more.

“Oh freak.” Rick smiled at Negan’s control on his cursing. “Feels too darn good.” 

“Maybe I should get you off just like this, four fingers buried deep in your ass and stroking your fat cock. Maybe I should let go of it and make you cum on my fingers alone.”

Negan groaned at the dirty words and pushed back only to receive a smack to his ass. It was pinched hard, his globes assaulted with a harsh sting. “Or I could just spank you.”

‘Damn, please do fucking any of it.’ Negan thought and bit his lip hoping silence would make Rick pick anything arousing soon.

“Oh you don’t care huh? I guess I can just jerk off in the bathroom and leave you alone then.”

Negan stumbled again and stared ahead. “No Rick just do any of it please.”

“Anythang huh?”

Nodding Negan bit back a scalding remark when fringes retreaded making him feel empty. 

“Please.” He faltered on the bed and dragged a pillow under his dick pumping into it to feel relief.

“I like that.” Rick smacked his ass again and got out of the bed. “Turn that cute ass around to face me and keep it up.”

Slow on the uptake Negan stared ahead and took in his statement. Realizing what was wanted he turned and put the pillow beneath him again and pushed against it moaning at a burst of precm soaking his dick, his slit was instantly dried up by the cotton pillow cover but he humped into it again.

Looking at Rick the man smiled and crossed his arms. “That’s right, keep it up.”

Too far gone he couldn’t disagree at the show he was making and thrusted into the pillow repeatedly, his precum diminishing greatly at the lack of stimulation to either side.

Walking to his back end Rick rubbed his scruff as he inspected Negan’s hole, it was small so he propped up another pillow under Negan's dick and two to his head watching him straddle the softness as he humped it harder.

Rick had found something when Negan was gone, he never thought he would return but just in case he kept it so he went to the closet and opened a trunk some adventurous couple had before everything fell apart. Rick had washed the contents several times with bleach and he pulled out two plugs, one small and the other medium. There was much more but this was a good start

Negan stopped to look over.

“No peeking!” 

At the order Negan thrusted into the pillow again moaning harder to entice Rick. His mouth watered at a purple small plug and a bigger black one coming back with Rick. “Shut that mouth, people don't need to hear your needy self moaning like a cat in heat.” His cheek was slapped but too soft to hurt, nonetheless he shut his mouth.

“I’ll give you what you want, I always do right?”

Negan nodded and pushed slower into the pillow, his dick not wet enough to make it feel good. A finger nudged at his hole before sliding across is rim teasingly, it pumped in just to stretch his sphincter, a gush of precum flooded from his tip making him sigh. “That’s all you really need isn’t it? Some ass play?”

“Yes.” 

“Yes what?” Rick pushed two fingers in stretching his hole out then rubbed across his inner wall.

That was new but must be what Rick wanted to hear so he moaned out. “Yes sir, it’s all I need.”

Rick slapped his ass. “Good boy.”

“Suck this good.” Rick ordered.

Negan gulped at the command, his dick straining. He opened his mouth moaning as much as he could with a plug shoved in his mouth.

“Get it nice and wet.”

Negan’s mouth flooded with saliva. His jaws aching when Rick forced the plug in and out of his mouth. Rick stood back stroking his dick while Negan closed his mouth, a diameter of purple showing off as his spit soaked the toy.

Negan whined at Rick coming back to him and removing the plug, his mouth aching when empty. His ass pulsed as if the loss was there and he hollered, his dick leaking at a slap.

“I like you needy and quiet but this won’t do.” Rick slapped inside his wet hole, a finger gliding in and massaging. 

When Rick spanked him again he grinded into the pillow. “Your sweet ass can take more. You should have spoke up.” 

Rick got the bigger plug and opened the cap on the lube, slick spread across his puckered hole gliding in to coat him thickly within. “I know you can take even more than this.” Rick said confidentiality as he waited a minute to see the final result. A plug pushed in and he rocked across the pillows.

Rick stroked himself at black nestled deeply in Negan’s ass, it slipped in like his fingers with no resistance. He contemplated leaving it in and ignoring Negan but thought better of it and slapped his ass watching the plug stay in proudly on display.

Pulling on the toy it pulled out with no issue and he lathered it up more, it was two inches more than the other and hardly bigger than his own, he would need to search for bigger toys. Hearing silence Negan pushed his ass up wanting something, anything.

“Think you can spread those pretty little cheeks for me?”

Not answering Negan moved and settled onto the pillows and pulled at his ass with both hands. Rick slapped into his hole. “You're supposed to answer.”

It was all so new to Negan, he didn't answer and already fulfilled the request, licking his lips he rasped an apology guessing that it was what Rick wanted. “Sorry sir, Yes I should have said yes and I’m sorry I did it so quickly.”

“Hmm it will go a lot easier next time if you just answer first so I don’t have to neglect this. Huh?” Rick stroked his pinned dick making him gasp. 

“Yes sir, I’ll do better.”

“Good.” Rick cooed and pet his rim. “Now spread them wider, let me see how nice that asshole looks.”

Gulping at just how filthy Rick could get he parted his cheeks again. Rick pumped his dick faster, it was rock hard and aching at the sight of Negan’s hole, it was dark and gaping but it could be so much wider but they had time, plenty of it so he nudged the slicked up plug to Negan’s ass shuddering as it slipped in. It slipped in effortlessly until the flared base, larger than the rest of it, there it stretched around pink walls.

Rick poured more lube onto his fingers and pulled the toy out lathering it and Negan’s walls. The plug was then pushed back in, pink flesh resisted against black silicone causing Negan to moan out louder. “Shit Negan I wish you could see your ass right now.”

Negan pumped into the pillow, his dick constantly seeping as the toy was pulled out again and pushed in deeper, Negan kept his body from convulsing and his legs from closing as Rick pressed firmly on the base and it popped in, a small burn tingled but was outweighed by his arousal and he grunted and pushed into the pillows. 

His teeth tore into his lips but didn't bleed as Rick pulled the toy out and popped it back in stretching his walls and his slit felt so good across the cotton now. Negan started a rhythm of humping his pillows in time with Rick’s pace of pushing the toy in and out and at every sting and pull to his outer rim he leaked more.

It was too much and not enough, and he whined when the plug stayed nestled in his ass. “I’m gonna make you feel real good Negan, I promise.” Rick’s twang was thick and overly southern and he stopped thrusting across the pillow suddenly give out.

Rick crawled on the bed and pet his hair. “Tired?”

Nodding a yes Negan then frowned and spoke even though it was hard to. “Yes sir.”

Rick smiled. “So good answering my question. You want to stop or get off?”

Negan still felt the edge of his climax and pushed further into the pillows. “Get off please.”

Firm hands kneaded his sore back and he groaned at pressure applied between his shoulders. “Okay, good. I can do that and the best part is all you have to do is lie still.”

“Thank you,” Negan whispered and turned his head receiving a kiss on the cheek.

Standing on his knees behind Negan he answered. “You're welcome darling.” Then looked at that black circle nestled in and smirked. Spreading Negan’s legs he pushed him up just enough to stroke Negan’s dick, precum flowed steadily down his hands as he thrusted his dick against the toy.

Negan groaned at Rick’s wet hands gliding across his shaft and the toy bumping into him, it stayed inside but tapped at each buck of Rick’s hips and he groaned out and started to lazily push back, His dick twitched and slick strokes sounded off the room making him moan out. Rick’s dick stood at full attention butting against the plug and the sounds Negan made caused him to snap harder against him. It was still not enough so he pulled on the plug feeling walls give in and the toy slid out. Throwing it down Rick pumped in and hit Negan’s prostate in a continuous snap, Negan stopped pushing back and stretched his legs wider letting him fuck in deeper. 

“You have the best ass Negan. It’s taking everything I give it and still comes back to me tight. I could fuck you all day long and all night and you wouldn't tire out would you?”

“No sir.” Negan groaned.

Strong hands pressed on the dip of his back and Rick pounded in harder, he cried out when Rick swirled at his slit and tugged on his balls. He came hard on the sheets crying out as Rick pushed in harder and kept jerking him off post orgasm, he felt white coat him deeply and closed his eyes.

Rick cleaned Negan off and kissed him before changing the sheets all as Negan didn't stir. 

When Negan came to he felt softer sheets and looked over to see Rick putting a glass of juice on the nightstand. “I thought I wore you out.”

“You did.”

“I got to leave soon, you need to rest but I’ll make you breakfast first before I go.”

Negan nodded and sat up halting at hardness poking inside his ass. 

Rick laughed and sat down after putting the juice in his hands that he downed quickly. “I put a plug in you, hope you don’t mind.”

Negan didn't but couldn't resist a joke. “I’m starting to worry you like me better knocked out.”

Rick pulled on his curls. “Sorry I should have asked first and…”

“Rick stop I’m teasing. It’s fine, it’s good to just sit back and let someone else take control I'm finding out, especially if that someone is you.”

Rick kissed him and smiled. “I'll make you breakfast now.”

That residing anger ignited but he didn’t want to be angry, didn’t want to cry in bed so he grabbed Rick’s hand. “Rick?”

“What’s wrong sweetie?” He could sense a change.

“Nothing really, I just need to be honest and that’s been hard for me in the past, actually my whole life but I don’t want that anymore.”

Rick nodded proud that Negan could open up so he sat down and looked into his hazel eyes conveying his emotions and eagerness to just listen.

“Jasmine isn’t just a name I picked out of a hat, it means something to me, something really important and I want us to agree on a name, one we both like but I want you to know that Jasmine was the best woman that I ever knew, she saved me and meant a lot to me.”

Rick pushed Negan over then gave him a kiss before slipping into bed beside him touching head to toe. “I’m glad you told me that Negan. Now tell me about her.”

Rick listened as Negan told him about Jasmine, she was his neighbor growing up and when she started to notice bruises and broken bones she would tend to him and feed him a big bowl of soup and churros. It got harder for her to let him go back home, even though he never told her what was going on she could fill in the blanks. One night he came to her with broken ribs and bleeding out, he thought he was dying but she sped off taking him one county over to be stitched up and given blood. It was a spanish hospital and no one asked a question when she paid with cash. Soon enough he woke up to a bed that wasn’t his.

Jasmine had him stay with a friend and as soon as he healed she had her network of friends and family keep him with them until he was further and further away in states from his home of Virginia. She would call him time to time speaking in hushed whispers like someone was listening and tell him his parents demanded to know where he was but she always told them she didn't know.

When he turned eighteen he went back to see her, requesting all his identity cards. It wasn’t a surprise to find out he wasn’t even listed as a missing person. His mother had long died and his dad was the same old drunk and he decided to live a few cities over and go to college always visiting Jasmine until one day he found out she had cancer. The sickness took her quickly and he felt like an orphan, though she didn't raise him. Negan didn’t cry until he mentioned her illness, then he held his belly and pushed the words out.

“She sounds like an amazing woman.”

“The best.” Negan sighed and settled down.

As Negan dried a tear Rick figured out he would have to come to terms with the name because it would belong to their child.


	17. Something’s up with Joey

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: mention of rape, non-descriptive.
> 
> Well readers it’s almost the end of the weekly updates. I started to post this push myself to finish it and all it’s done for me is get one more chapter written. 🙄

Daryl wiped at his eyebrow, sweat dripping down. It was hot already at ten am, his motorcycle had been cutting up when he pulled it out of park and two hours later he still hasn’t figured it out. It might be time to look for a new bike on a run Daryl thought as he bent down to get his wrench.

A gasp had him turning around.

Joseph froze but still managed to trip over his feet as he held a bottle of water. “Hey.” It was strangled and Joseph coughed, clearing his throat. “Hey um Daryl. I brought you some water.”

Daryl’s own ma never brought him anything but here this large man stood with a bottle in hand, he thought maybe it was poisoned but that made no sense and he walked over to see it was sealed anyway.

“Thanks Joey.” Daryl snatched the bottle and drank half of it down in one go.

“No problem. I saw how hard you were working and figured you needed a drink.”

Never one for small talk Daryl nodded and took another sip.

“Know what’s wrong with her?” Joseph swiped a hand across the glossy paint yelping too loud at the small smack to his hand.

“No touching.”

“Sorry.” Joseph mumbled and rubbed at his fingers, not because it hurt but because Daryl had touched him.

‘He’s just being nice even if he’s a weird fucker.’ Daryl thought to himself.

“Know anything about bikes?”

“A little.” Joseph said too low, he actually knew a lot but didn’t want to sound cocky. It was his best chance in, but he was never very confident.

“Well look at these two lovebirds!” Negan shouted across the street and walked or rather waddled across to them.

Daryl grit his teeth, he hated anything Negan said. Rick ran behind him, popping him too gently against his head.

“Joseph, are you finally being productive in this fine community and helping Daryl with his bike? It will be fixed by tomorrow!”

Daryl cut his eyes at Joseph who looked down. “You said you know a little.”

Negan laughed, it was loud and boisterous but he got winded and put his hands on his knees, breathing in hard. “Not the time to hold back Joey.” 

It was a disappointed whisper but too loud for Daryl not to hear it. 

“I may have worked on a bike or two.” Joseph said defensively.

“Bull crap!” Negan laughed and touched his stomach, if Daryl didn’t know any better he would say he’s pregnant. “He knows a lot! More than you probably freaking do Daryl!”

Freaking? Who was this guy? Because Negan definitely cussed throughout entire conversations.

Negan leaned against Rick who allowed it and had that gooey eyed look, his eyes soft and mouth all slack. 

“Oh fucking no!” Daryl yelled and stood closer to Joseph but only to get a better look at the pair.

“What?” Rick stood straighter but didn’t push Negan away.

“You two are together?” There was still disbelief as he crossed his arms.

“We are, why thank you!” Negan slowly batted his eyes and nuzzled into Rick more who slapped at him but put his arms around his waist.

“Daryl you're my brother, I want you to be able to accept this.”

The taste in his mouth was sour but Rick seemed happy and Negan’s belly bulge was suspect, he thought back on that ultrasound machine. Maybe Negan had a stomach tumor and Rick being the nice guy he was decided to give him his last rights, yeah it had to be that. Yet, he still didn’t believe that either. “Fine. Just go show your nasty PDA to someone who wants to see it! Skit on now! I’m working!”

Rick knew it was okay if Daryl was being abrasive, not talking was worse. “Okay Daryl we will talk tonight.”

Patting his friend's arm he turned and Negan gave a sly wink back towards Daryl as he took Rick’s hand.

“I need to tell him you're pregnant tonight!” Rick hushed yelled.

“What?”

Daryl heard Negan whispering maniacally but didn't give a shit and went to his bike handing a socket wrench to Joseph. 

“I kind of think they’re cute together.”

Daryl huffed and pulled out a cigarette lighting it because he felt a headache coming on.

“Well I do.” Joseph clenched his tool closer.

When another cigarette was offered Joseph felt a tingle beneath his skin and took it even though he didn't smoke. Putting it to his mouth he almost tipped forward when Daryl lit his cigarette still between his lips. Coughing at an inhale Daryl slapped his back and pulled his cigarette from his mouth, Joey’s stomach fluttered. 

“Why waste my cigarettes if you don’t smoke?”

“I like to try new things.” Joseph explained and took the cigarette back feeling woozy when his fingers glazed across Daryl's.

Everything was fucking weird now. Daryl shook his hand feeling a burn from Joseph's hands, the man took too long touching him. Negan had a huge belly and Rick was fucking a man! Walkers should have been his first guess things were going to hell.

Joseph flopped on the ground bravely touching his bike. “When Rick tells you what’s going on, I want you to be nice to Negan.”

Daryl knew Joseph was meek but hearing his voice get higher he sat down beside Joseph wanting to hear what was next.

“He’s been cruel I know but he’s been through tough shit. It’s no excuse but he’s not as evil as you think. My old group was terrible but our leader was the worst. Kane raped women and I couldn’t help them, a few of us talked about banding together and killing him but most of our group was just as bad. Negan came in demanding half and it didn't take long to see he was really in charge but Kane was still doing what he wanted when it wasn’t tribute time, sending us all out on runs. One day we found this sixteen year old in the woods, skinny and scared and he raped her as soon as he barged in. Negan happened to make a surprise visit and that was it. He bashed his head in and demanded to know who was in on it, he always can smell a bad fish miles away. By the time he was done all the good ones were left, well good at that time.”

“So he saved the girl then blew her up?”

“She didn’t want to be part of a group after that, he let her go with two bags of food and medical supplies on her shoulder.”

“He's still not good!” Daryl spat.

“And you are? One hundred percent good?”

Joseph had him there. “Let’s just work on this bike.”

Three hours later Daryl’s bike was fixed, it felt odd handing tools over to someone else but his motorcycle was shifting gears. “Thanks Joseph, I might even let you take it for a spin.” He joked.

“I'm scared of bikes.” Joseph admitted.

“Are you serious? It’s not that dangerous.”

“I’ve seen plenty a dude be scraped off the road, I just like looking at them and fixing them.”

It wasn’t right and Daryl shook his head and stomped inside the house he claimed as his. Joseph panted in the heat drinking his water wondering where that succulent man went. His breath lost him when broad shoulders ran down steps with two helmets.

“Uh..no.” Joseph gasped.

“Time to earn your wings.”

“I can’t!” Joseph just couldn’t! Let Daryl ride his bike, wrap his hands around that strong torso, he may get too turned on and Daryl would “feel” it on his bike. This was horrible, much more so than riding a damn bike.

“Come on.” Daryl sounded low and raspy, almost seductive but it couldn’t be true.

He almost fainted when the helmet was placed on his head and Daryl swung on his bike.

“Come here.” Daryl's voice was like honey as he pat the seat behind him.

Joseph gulped once then bit his inner cheek, he would do this and own it. Daryl put a glove on and rubbed it across his beaten jeans and coming towards him Joseph decided to own this shit!

“Joseph! Joseph!” Daryl slapped Joey who had passed out.

“Wha...?” He garbled.

“Don’t speak!” He splashed water over Joey’s face and wiped him down with his rag.

Slowly coming to Daryl let him rest against him. 

“Man I don't know what happened. We were going to take a ride but you got this stupid look on your face and then just passed out cold. Took me a minute to get you coherent.”

It could have been his moment if he wasn’t so stupid. Joseph looked down wondering if he would ever get a break in life.

Daryl didn’t know what was wrong with Joey but he was definitely strange so he helped him up, “Let’s get you cooled off.”

Daryl put an arm around the larger man and led him up his stairs not as uncomfortable as he should be with the close touching.

“Well freaking look at that!” Negan chuckled, his whole belly moving.

“I only saw Daryl helping Joseph up because he somehow was on the ground. He’s always nice.”

Negan kissed Rick deeply then ran a hand through his growing scuff. “One day you will learn to listen to me Ricky. What we just witnessed was the bite of love.”

Rick swatted Negan’s ass and thought maybe they should fuck after lunch. “You're full of shit Negan. As usual.”

Taking that arm that was now his he clung to it and smiled. “All in due time baby, you will see then.” Negan stated with conviction.


	18. Carl Finally Gets it and an Admission

They walked a long while then went back home. His feet were achy but Negan insisted on cooking, Rick helped him swatting his ass more than helping out which was fine because he was a shit cook.

“I wish little sugar bug could live in another world.” Negan stated casually still stirring his pot.

“Maybe she will.”

Negan laughed at that, his belly jiggling. “And I’m freaking Santa Claus!”

Rick wanted it to be true but laughed so much tears came to his eyes.

“What?” Negan pointed a spoon at him.

“I was picturing you as Santa and I still can’t get over your vulgar language taming down to a total zero.”

“I don't want her to hear it and she's not dating until she’s forty.”

Rick rubbed Negan’s back while rolling his eyes but Negan caught on.

“I’m serious. Thirty. Maybe she can date at thirty.”

“You can wish.” Rick went to lick a spoonful of Negan’s homemade spaghetti sauce only to have his hand slapped away.

“Germs!”

“That you already have.” Rick retorted, easing his hands down to Negan’s ass and rubbing circular.

Ignoring it Negan turned down the stove. “Men are pigs now, they rape and take what they want. It’s only going to get worse.”

“Will you stop obsessing Negan? None of the men here rape or hurt, their children won’t either. She will be fine.”

“Sure.” Negan’s tone was low and solemn.

“Negan.” He warned sternly.

Turning around Negan hugged him inhaling at his neck deeply.

“She will be okay, we have a whole community watching her.”

Nodding in fake agreement he breathed in more.

“These hormones are really getting to you huh?”

“Butthole.” It was muffled, lips still clinging to his neck.

Letting it go Rick stirred the pot of noodles.

“That’s all you’re allowed to do in the kitchen.” Negan warned.

At lunch they sat across from each other staring intently, little smiles exchanged and no words needed.

Carol ran in and fixed a bowl raving on the smell and taking a small bite moaning in appreciation, she kissed Rick’s cheek and thanked Negan for cooking, gliding her hands across his stiff shoulders and running off with her bowl to eat on the go.

Carl came in next, staying mute he fixed a plate and sat at the head of the table obviously pleased by his meal but other than giving Negan the stink eye he looked down at his large plate of food.

“Enid would probably like some.” Negan commented.

“She has civilized taste, she wouldn’t.”

“Carl!” Rick was tired of this.

Negan didn’t give a shit, the brat hated him and that was fine.

“I’ve already told you.” Rick pressed.

“I don’t care.” Carl sassed back.

“Rick it’s fine.” Standing up Negan hobbled to the sink to wash the dishes.

“I can do it, you cooked already.” Rick rubbed his back gently.

“Eww.”

“Carl!” It had been a long time since he wanted to spank his son.

“It’s fine.” Negan simply repeated allowing the rag to be taken from him.

Sitting down he thought he would let Rick rub everything tonight, his ass, back, feet, even something more southbound.

“Ugh!” He moaned out at his baby kicking, another kick followed.

“You okay?”

“Yeah sugar bug just wants to play volleyball and I guess I’m the ball.”

Carl stopped scarfing down his good to stare intrigued. Negan stood up bracing the table rubbing his stomach. When his dad came over and pushed on Negan’s stomach and started whispering to his sibling he looked up to see Negan smiling and even after a harder kick he patted his stomach and kissed Rick, only a soft peck.

“Can I?”

He didn’t mean to say it aloud but Rick looked over at him seriously listening to what he asked. Negan stopped touching his stomach to smile at him.

“Can you what kid?” It was taunting, that smirk was back letting Carl know that Negan knew exactly what he was asking.

He opened his mouth to say nevermind, to even be mean but Rick started to grin in understanding and approached him and as the first word went to leave his mouth Negan started to laugh.

“You're a rude little crap but come over here.”

Feeling like he was on display he shrank back but his dad steered him with his shoulders toward Negan who had his hands at his sides. Swallowing nervously he felt the kick, one like he felt from Judith so long ago.

“I’m not made of glass.” Negan took his hands and pressed them firmly in.

His palms trapped between Negan he felt a big kick.

“Does it hurt?” He couldn’t help himself at this point.

“It’s just weird, when it’s a big one like that it feels odd but it means she’s okay, that she’s growing.”

Carl saw Negan’s smile falter a millisecond before he put it back on.

“Why wouldn’t she be?”

“Carl.” Rick’s southern drawl was edgy and dragged out, his warning to stop.

“No it’s okay Rick, everything's fine. Crap, he’s not a child. It’s not something that should be hidden from him.”

“It’s not him I’m worried about.”

A moment passed where Rick got that  
concerned auro to him and Negan stared at him in challenge.

“I took a few kicks froM The Saviors. I was worried that she might have been...but she’s fine.”

The back of Carl’s hand was tapped reassuringly, something clicked in recognition. Negan was grinning broadly, his eyes misty but he covered it up well.

“At least I think it’s a girl.” Negan stated not realizing what was dawning on Carl.

“Really?”

“That's what I feel, your daddy says I might be right.”

“You're going to be a great dad.” Carl reassured him.

His dad’s head spun around so fast it hurt, Negan pushed his stomach into his hand further.

“If I’m half as good as your dad I’m going to be okay.” He winked at Rick who stepped back to view what was going on like he needed to remember it forever.

“What would you have done of she died inside you?” Carl pressed into his stomach still feeling.

Rick gritted his teeth but just observed.

“Probably have died myself.” Negan automatically answered, he looked so sad Rick wanted to run to him but didn't want to ruin the moment.

“But she’s okay, everything's fine.” Carl hugged Negan, it was quick but it happened.

Negan swallowed and before he could reply Carl had stepped back. “I’m going to check the perimeter.

“Darn kid.” Negan sighed rubbing his growing belly.

“I think he’s warming up to you.”

“Yeah.” Negan huffed out.

When Rick kissed him then held him close he said nothing of the small puffs against his neck or when Negan held him closer.  
—  
Rick felt jittery, he could feel sweat at the nape of his neck. Daryl was coming over for dinner and he was going to tell him the truth. Negan helped him cook Daryl's favorite, rabbit stew and splurging they made a small batch of jelly to go on bread. He would smell it a mile away.

“Hey Daryl!”

Daryl took the cigarette out his mouth and waved at Joey who was sitting on his porch steps. He ignored the nagging feeling in his stomach and waved, only grunting his way before walking on.

“Hey!”

Daryl stubbed out his cigarette and took Negan in, he was forcing a smile and his eyes zoned in on his protruding stomach. He grunted and knocked his arm across Negan’s as he walked in.

“Daryl!”

He could smell the stew cooking, it smelled better than usual, savory with a hint of sweetness. Daryl's stomach pained in hunger at the waffling of the meal. “Hey Rick.”

Approaching Rick he saw the wrapped up bread and picked up a dark red jar of jam. “Carol?”

“No. Negan, he knows his way around the kitchen.”

“And killing.”

“Daryl.” Rick sounded disappointed.

“Look I’m trying to justify it in my head but I don’t get it man. He killed Glenn and other’s, made our life hell. What he did to me...”

It was rarely brought up but Daryl clenched his eyes shut and balled up his hands.

“I know.”

Rick pulled his chin up and he opened his eyes to see Rick’s understanding.

“You always understood me more than anyone except Beth.” Daryl sucked in a breath. “Don’t you get it?”

“There’s things you don’t know yet.”

Daryl turned his head when Negan stepped into the kitchen and scoffed.

“I don’t think I can do this.”

It was time to leave but Rick grabbed his hand. “You're my best friend and I don't want to lose you.”

Rick had whispered it but he heard it. He couldn’t comprehend the grimace as Rick looked back to Negan worried but then his friend turned to him again. “He can leave and just you and me can talk if that would be easier.”

Daryl didn’t miss the flash of hurt from Negan and he knew the man was here to stay. “No. He can stay...I just need another cigarette and he’s being fucking weird.”

Negan stepped back and gasped at his cursing. “Like that!” Daryl pointed to him. “He’s not his usual self but tell him when I come back and sit down and eat with him that I don’t want to hear his smart mouth!”

“Okay Daryl.”

Daryl didn’t look up at him as he walked outside. It was going to be a long night and he knew he wouldn’t be happy with whatever secret Rick had to tell him.

“How are you feeling?” Rick rubbed Negan’s stomach.

“I get it, what I did to him was disgusting. If there’s anyone who can’t forgive me, should hate me it’s him.”

“He will forgive you because that’s the relationship we have.”

Daryl flicked the embers off his cigarette and tried to calm down. There was no understanding it but Rick didn’t fall in love easily and Negan had to have a redeeming factor about him if Rick forgave him for it all but it still wasn’t right. Joey’s words rang in his head, he already knew this was serious, he rubbed his temples and grunted when he started thinking of Joey and him working on his bike together. Staring across what was slowly becoming his home Daryl marched back inside convincing himself everything would be okay because he had followed Rick this far.

When he came back in, Negan was sitting at the table rubbing his stomach, the man really needed to start working out Daryl thought as he sat down.

“I’m glad you came back.” Rick stated and started to spoon stew into bowls.

“Don’t think I had a choice.” He grumbled.

Negan opened up the jam and smeared a thick layer of it onto the bread that was now sliced and on the table. Rick gave him the first bowl and he blew on it briefly and stuck it in his mouth moaning and it appeared it wasn’t swallowed before he bit onto a slice of bread.

“Keep on and you won’t fit through the house.” Daryl grumbled lowly.

Negan froze then spat out the chewed food onto a plate and slide his chair back, Daryl thought he must be losing it because he swore he heard him start crying.

“Daryl!” Rick hissed and put his bowl down running after Negan.

“What the fuck!” Daryl screamed into the empty kitchen.

Negan stormed out and braced his hands on the wood railing of the porch and cried knowing he was being irrational and he needed to sit down, his back was aching.

“Negan.”

Sitting down he stared at his hands. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

“He doesn't know you’re pregnant.”

“I’ve been eating too much.” Negan said through a sniffle.

“He doesn't know Negan, he thinks you’re just getting bigger.”

“I am.” Negan laughed out.

Kneeling before him Rick looked up brushing his hair back. “He’s mad at you, he’s going to attack you Negan. You're not eating too much, the rest of you isn’t getting that much bigger, just your stomach and it needs to. She’s growing in there.” Rick rubbed his stomach.

“I know.” He was being sensitive and he hated it.

“Do you need to go to bed? Daryl and I can talk and I can bring you up some food after you calm down.”

“It can’t just be you, we need to talk to him together.” Negan dried his tears away.

Rick stood up and leaned down to kiss him. “You okay?”

“Yeah I just needed a cry I guess.”

“I can understand that. It’s been a long day and you’re getting tired now but you need to eat tonight.”

“Yeah.” Negan agreed.

“Let’s cut to the chase. We will tell him, he’s probably licked his bowl clean and ate it all up with his hands by now.”

“I think you’re right Ricky.” Negan ran a tongue along his teeth.

Sure enough when they returned to the kitchen Daryl had polished off his bowl. He saw Negan had been crying and shrugged his shoulders, it didn’t matter, the ass deserved to feel bad all the time.

Rick sat down and patted his seat and almost shy like Negan sat in the offered chair.

“You’re not going to believe this.” Rick started. “It’s not going to be easy to believe.”

Rick looked over to Negan and squeezed his hand then stood up and brought over a coffee tin and opened it. Something was slid over his way and looking down Daryl scrunching his eyes up at what was photos.

“Negan’s pregnant with my child.”

Not quite processing it Daryl looked at another photo of a white lump. “Come again?”

“He’s pregnant.” Rick spoke slowly.

“What kind of joke is this?” Daryl looked at the pair but saw serious expressions.

“I might look stupid Rick but a man pregnant?”

“And corpses walking around eating people?”

Negan touched his stomach. “I don’t know if I’m the only man pregnant but it's true.”

“Come on man! Even if I believe this how did it happen to begin with? You’re supposed to hate him!”

“I did.” Rick squeezed Negan’s hand. “I was angry and typical Negan he thought it was going to be the way he wanted it.” Rick smirked at Negan.

“Boy was I wrong.” Negan whistled.

“Stop!” Daryl felt disgusted. “Are you sure it’s a baby? It could be a tumor.”

Rick tapped on the pictures. “It’s a girl we think, we’re naming her Jasmine if so.”

Negan started to sniffle and his eyes were all soft and misty as his lip quivered.

Daryl pulled the photo to his face then grumbled. “I got to let this sink in.”

“Are we okay?”

For a minute Daryl thought they weren’t but seeng Rick look at him hopeful he thought of Judith and what she meant to him, he loved her and he was her uncle though she wasn’t Rick’s. Rick couldn’t abandon a child that wasn’t his so he wouldn’t dump this one and he wouldn’t want him to, it was part of the reason he had trusted in Rick so long, he always did what was right even when it was hard.

“Yeah, I’m not going to pretend to magically understand this but it’s happening.”

Standing up Rick nodded at him and went to shake his hand, they hadn’t done that in forever and Daryl had to pull him in for a hug. “You will always be my brother.”

“Always.” Rick squeezed him harder and Daryl pulled away when Negan started to blow his nose into a paper towel.

Daryl let himself be walked out the door with Rick and Negan following behind, this was how it was going to be now, a puppy following his master he guessed.

“Night Daryl.”

“Night.”

Rick went to close the door but Negan stopped him and opened it fully again.

“Tell Joey I said hellooo.” Negan cooed in a taunt.

“What?” Negan yelped.

Rick jabbed his ribs and Negan hushed his laughter and walked away.

Rick just shook his head and waved to Daryl before closing the door.

“What the hell?” Daryl grumbled out.

He only noticed he stopped in his tracks once he hit Joey’s house when the man called out to him and his feet carried him to the man’s porch then into his house.  
————————————————————  
Daryl caught himself just before he fell on the floor, not his floor but Joey’s, he had fallen asleep on his couch.

Last night:

“I bet you knew the whole damn time!” Daryl screamed at Joey who had called him over.

“Just calm down Daryl.”

“You think this is funny? My best friend sleeping with him after all he did to me?”

Joey had the decency to look at least a bit ashamed. “It's not that easy Daryl.”

“What? He may not rape a girl but bashing an innocent man’s head in is okay. He had a name not that you would understand that!”

It was wrong, Joey didn’t make this happen, he wasn’t Rick who he wanted to yell this to. Joey sat down and just looked at him, waiting for him to spill his guts out.

“What he did to me...” Daryl fought not to cry.

“Wasn’t right.” Joey answered.

He wasn’t sure if he liked the honest answer, if he wanted Joey to answer for him or just listen.

“I’m not saying he’s like you, like your family, even like me. I’ve never killed a man Daryl but what do you want? Him to be kicked out and eaten alive? Give birth to this child and be locked away from them? What better option do you see than the road Rick took? Forgiveness isn’t always easy but sometimes is better than the alternative.”

“Glenn saved me too many times, he believed we could be better than this.”

“And we can be Daryl. One step at a time. I’ve seen what’s happening here. There’s all types of people who banded together not out of fear but need. There’s no sexism, racism, bigotry of any kind and that’s something to be proud of. Letting Negan in with no punishment is proving that too.”

“I’m supposed to just forgive him just like this?” Daryl snapped his fingers.

“Maybe you should start with yourself first, easier step.”

“What the hell does that mean?” Daryl screamed, marching across the room to get in Joey’s face.

“It means Negan killed your friend because he wanted to. Not because of what you said, you being locked up couldn’t have went another way either. You couldn’t have gotten out of there by yourself if you tried.”

“I didn't try and I know it’s not my fault.”

“It’s not your fault.” Joey repeated like it was plain as day.

When Daryl dared to look up the man was already out of sight. He felt a tingle of disappointment that he refused to realize transformed to relief when Joey came back with a pillow and blanket.

“You should sleep here tonight.”

There was no good night parting, Joey dropped his stuff on the table and simply left him alone to see that he indeed couldn’t help what happened to him or Glenn.

Daryl sat up and sighed, he didn’t remember putting the blanket over himself before going to bed, he swore he kept in on the table because he never slept with cover but this house did have a draft, maybe in his sleep he reached out for it.

“Morning.”

Joey walked up to him and offered him a cup of coffee, it looked different than any coffee he had before and he groaned at the small sweet taste of it.

“Dark hot chocolate mixed with coffee.” Joey would never explain he knew Daryl loved chocolate almost as much as coffee.

“It’s good.”

Joey blushed drinking on his plain coffee, not much in the mug because due to rations he gave most of his to Daryl.

“Feeling better?”

“Yeah.”

“I should have gave you the bed.” Joey had to say it, it bothered him all night causing him to toss and turn as he thought of Daryl laying on the hard couch.

“I’ve had much worse.”

“Like Negan’s cell?” He knew it would take Daryl more than a day to get over it.

“No like home.” Daryl was about to take another swig of his coffee but he stopped, angry that he let that out.

“Makes this stuff look civilized sometimes, doesn't it?”

Daryl saw that Joey didn’t bat an eye just continued to talk like they were discussing weekend plans, there was no pity or anger at his past, only acceptance that it happened to him, he preferred that.

“Yeah.”

“I got to help Roger with his bike, feel free to have breakfast or do whatever.”

Wanting to believe he wanted to be alone Daryl nodded planning to fry an egg but when Joey opened the door he ran to it.

“Joey?”

“Yeah?”

It was crazy to think the man had stammered, there was a trickle of sweat beading down his forehead.

‘He must be hot natured.’ Daryl thought.

“I still owe you a bike ride.” Internally he cursed at himself for saying it, why did he want this grown ass man to ride bitch?

“I’ll think about it Daryl.”

It didn't seem odd to him that he didn't think Joey was a pussy for being scared of riding.

“Think they’re getting freaky deaky yet?” Negan chomped down on a piece of buttered toast.

“I think you worry too much about what Daryl's doing. Sure you don’t want him instead?” Rick sassed.

“Too greasy.” Negan answered like he thought of it before.

“Are you telling me you’ve checked him out?”

“Of course baby. He’s got a nice body if lanky ain’t your thing. Needs to cut that hair though.”

It was stupid to be insecure and Rick laughed high pitched. “Yeah I guess so.”

“But you know I enjoy sleeping with men I know won’t shove a knife between my eyes as I sleep.”

Negan leaned over to kiss him quickly so he could eat more of his food, gosh he was ravenous. Rick covertly looked at his plate, Negan needed to eat more and he needed to go out and find more food and batteries.

They spent the rest of the night together and Negan was extra cuddly holding onto Rick as he read to their sugar bug and he moaned out practically falling asleep as he was lathered down with lotion.

“Something I meant to ask you a while back.”

“Hmm.” Negan cracked open an eye then closed it again.

“Daryl. Back when we were still enemies you spotted him. He admitted to me he almost shit his pants.”

“Don't say that word in front of our daughter.”

Rick rolled his eyes and turned off the lights letting Negan snuggle into him.

“Why did you let him stay? You didn’t even punish or acknowledge him.”

Negan nestled down and rubbed his stomach before turning on his back groaning at his aches and pains. “I felt bad when I held him, saw the signs. His back, I knew he didn’t have it good growing up. That’s part of it and the truth is I was already regretting what I was doing. Sometimes I convinced myself I wasn't a total jerk but I was a bad guy, killing people was wearing me down and I guess part of me was happy when that hippie sprung him out.”

“Why didn’t you just change tactics? Tell your men to be better.”

“I felt like I was in too deep Rick and I was, those men didn’t want to change. If I softened up they would have killed me and been a worse group. If I killed them I was just adding to it but in the end that’s what happened anyway. Darned if you do, damned if you don't.”

“I still can’t believe you stopped cursing.”

“Stop.” Negan pinched his side.

Rick sided up to him and kissed him, it was slow and sweet, laying his hands across Negan’s stomach he sighed and couldn’t believe he was pregnant.

“So. Daryl and Joey you think?”

“Hmm. I know, bet they’re porking right now. Daryl might be sprawled across his motorcycle letting Joey lay into him.”

“Shut up!” Rick cringed at the visual.

“Come on Rick, it’s just two dudes in love just like us.”

It was the closest he had gotten to admitting it.

“So does that mean you love me?” Rick didn't mean to sound so desperate but he wanted to hear it.

Sucking in a breath Negan bit his lip, it was time and he knew he was being stupid. “Yeah you moron, you know I do.”

Rick kissed him gently. “Just say it once more, for real.”

“Rick Grimes I love you.”

Rick didn't need the lights on to commit the revelation to memory, he could see Negan smiling in his imagination.

“Took you long enough.”

“This hispanic lady told me long ago that the things that took time meant the most in life.”

“Smart lady.” Rick kissed him again.

Nothing said could be any truer, much like them hating each other to getting here, it felt like more when you put effort into it.


	19. A Joy Ride

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bad news, next weeks chapter will have me caught up. Idk how long it will take for the next chapter to be written.

24 hours later:

“Time to get up.” Negan stirred smelling breakfast.

Sitting up he grabbed the offered plate cutting into a pancake.

“Someone’s hungry.” Rick said.

Rick sat down watching Negan take another bite. 

“Sorry I went from sick to always da...darn hungry.”

“You should be eating more.” Rick fussed.

“Sure.” Negan took a sip of his milk and rubbed his stomach, it was too big.

“I’m serious. We’re running low on supplies and you need to eat more.”

“I eat plenty.” Negan pushed a piece of ham into his mouth, happy it didn’t make him feel sick.

“So…” Rick scooted closer to Negan and rubbed his knee.

“Don’t.” Negan put the plate down.

“Don’t what?” Rick pressed his hand up further.

“Whatever you are thinking about telling me don’t.”

“Negan.”

His heart started to race, Rick and him hadn’t even known each other intimately that long but he could feel it, Rick was bracing himself to tell him something he didn't want to hear. He wanted to ignore it, there was nothing Rick needed to tell him.

“So I think we should take a stroll today, get future serial killer to come along and then we could always take some lawn chairs over to Joey’s house. See how long it takes Daryl to get there.”

“Negan.”

“Or we could decorate that room? The one you said was for sugar bug. Carol brought me some light blue paint, not what I really want. Our girl should have a pink nursery ya know? Light blues not bad though.”

“Negan” Rick pinched his nose. Negan was ignoring him.

“I got to use the bathroom.”

He rushed to it, slamming the door shut and screw it, he sat on the toilet peeing like an emasculated bulldog. He didn’t want to hear it, it couldn't be bad news or Rick wouldn’t have even tried to butter him up. 

“Crap I’m still peeing.” Negan muttered and put his elbows on his knees and inhaled.

“Even Lori never read me this well.” Rick said to himself and stood up to pace.

Negan and him were together but he shouldn’t read him with skill. It was just a short run, Rick still had people to provide for. Sure most hated Negan but Carol agreed to come over and watch him. He couldn’t put runs on other people.

“Negan. Come out.” 

Of course the door was locked.

“Are we going to talk like rational people or do you want to walk out and me just be gone?”

Negan tried to think about what he could have done to tick Rick off, maybe he was leaving him. Would it be better if he came out and he was already gone? He couldn't look in those gorgeous blue eyes and accept him leaving him. Judith! Maybe Judith was sick. No, he would have just told him.

Flushing the toilet Negan starred in the mirror and exhaled. He had a natural glow suddenly, his face was rounder, the beard was getting out of hand. He needed to trim it down.

“Negan I’m growing impatient.”

Rick prided himself on his calm demeanor at all times but seeing Negan ignore him was irritating him, time was ticking as well. Michonne and Aaron were waiting on him.

Sheepishly Negan pried the door open and crossed his arms, he walked out but leaned against the wall sliding further back when Rick came closer.

“You are aware you’re carrying a child and that you aren’t a child yourself right?”

“Nice.” Negan slid further away.

“I was trying to spend breakfast with you, have a few minutes with you peacefully before I left.”

Left? So he was dumping his ass.

“I don’t want to but I have obligations. I need to go on a run, if everything goes good I’ll be back tonight. I’ll try to bring you back some paydays okay?”

A few days ago Negan had a half hour conversation about the candy.

“Be good. Carol’s coming to keep you company.”

Rick kissed his forehead and went to pull away but Negan grabbed him and pressed their heads together. “I thought you were dumping me.”

“Ouch!” Negan screamed and rubbed his head where Rick thunked it.

“You're so stupid sometimes. Irrational Negan. We went to bed fine. Why would I be leaving you?”

“Should I start a list?” Negan whispered.

“Hey.” Rick hugged him. “We started at square one okay. All that old stuff doesn't matter, let’s just keep it right from now on.”

“Can’t you just stay?”

“I can’t Negan. It’s one day okay? We all need things but you need more food. Our babies growing and you should have put on more weight. I know this because of Lori. I’ll be fine. I’ll be back soon.”

Rick kissed his head and he watched him leave.

‘He could die out there. I don’t want you to be alone.’ Negan knew he was thinking crazy but it didn't stop him from laying down in bed and pushing the plate of food away.  
———————————————————————  
“Come on.” 

Daryl had spent all of yesterday thinking of Joey. Joey on his bike, that Joey had been the one to put the blanket over him the night before. Why did Joey know how to repair bikes but didn’t fess up when Daryl was tinkering with it?

“Where are we going?”

He tried to ignore that Joey was wearing a tight t shirt and blue pajama bottoms. That his shirt was stretched across his torso but that the man was surely losing weight and his arms looked more toned. It was just a damn t shirt.

“Put some jeans on now!”

Daryl was barking orders at him and there was no way he would disobey them, didn't want to but he flushed because he knew what came next. Daryl had a plan for them, maybe it was to fix a bike or to go on a run but his fingers shook when he thought of what it most likely was. Dary wanted him to ride on his bike.

Joey changed, putting on a better t shirt and his nicest pair of jeans. He wet wiped himself quickly since he hadn’t showered and put on deodorant then pulled out a small bottle of cologne he had found and took a whiff.

“Get it together Joey.”

“Joseph!”

The loud bang at his bathroom door made him jump and yelp very femininely but he didn’t care. He pulled his shirt up smelling his armpits and was pleased, he thumbed his fingers through his hair and walked out.

Daryl stared, it was a long hard gaze. Those blue eyes just looked into his then traveled up to his hair. Daryl’s pink tongue licked across his lips subconsciously and raked over his torso and down his jeans.

‘He’s not looking at my dick.’ Joey thought, there was no way.

“Let’s go.”

Daryl's voice was strangled and high pitched, he coughed and walked out expecting Joey to follow which of course he did.

Daryl’s shoulders and hips formed a perfect triangle, the blue sleeveless shirt he wore showed off his frame, his waist sloped down. Just right for Joey to put his arms around and hold tight.

“Shit!”

Joey slid down the stairs almost taking Daryl with him but he grabbed the railing to catch himself.

“Watch where you go!”

Daryl didn't help him up and kept walking down and out the door. 

Joey adjusted himself and stood straighter, putting on his best saunter he stepped out and approached Daryl who was smoking.

“You should be more careful! You can't be clumsy like that with walkers.”

He didn't know if that was concern or Daryl judging him.

“I don’t go around tripping all day.”

“Good.” Daryl took another puff.

Joey put his hands in his pockets waiting on Daryl’s next cue. 

“Want one?” 

A cigarette was shoved in front of his face awkwardly.

“No thanks.”

Daryl put the smoke back in his pack and looked out onto the yard. “I’m finishing this cigarette and then you’re going to take a ride.”

“On your bike?”

“On what else?” Daryl rasped and flicked away the ashes of his cigarette. His fingers were so long and lithe. Attractive as they held onto the cigarette.

‘Oh you have no idea.’ Joseph suppressed a gasp at his dirty thought.

“We could always help Rick with that run.” Joseph suggested.

Joey didn’t want to ride.

“You're riding on a bike and I’m cool with Rick but still pissed. Need a break from him.”

The silence stretched on but it wasn't uncomfortable.

“Come on, you know the way.”

Joey felt watched, Daryl was behind him. Could be checking out his ass for all he knew. That was ridiculous, the only one with a huge man crush here was Joey.

Daryl watched Joey's ass. It was almost as if he was swaying, such confident steps. Something Daryl didn’t think Joey could achieve if he was actually trying, he was a bumbling idiot afterall. He filled out those jeans well though, Daryl could tell for sure he was losing weight. Nothing wrong with that ass before but this ass was smaller. Wait what? Daryl bit his lip and shook his head. Something was wrong very, very wrong.

“Hello?” Joey snapped his fingers in front of Daryl, not too close though.

“What?”

“I asked if you are sure we should do this. I mean I am on the larger side.”

It was the third time he had asked Daryl the same question, each time phrased a little different but the hunter had his eyes locked on the ground, looking like he was questioning his whole life’s existence. His lips were tight formed and his posture stiff.

“Big dudes ride all the time Joseph. Big men and women too as a couple.”

‘But their opposite sexes and an actual couple.’ Joey couldn’t say it aloud.

“So...” Daryl rasped out.

Joey felt faint when Daryl actually straddled his bike and cranked it up, revving the engine and looked at Joey.

“Come on. Daylight's wasting.”

It was like Tom Cruise but hotter when Daryl put on some damn sunglasses and jerked his head motioning for Joey to get on.

There was no way he could do it.

“Joey.” Daryl’s voice yelled still raspy but stronger, an order to be followed.

“Get your ass on now.” Each word was articulated.

Gulping Joey walked slowly up to the motorcycle. He tried to put a leg over without touching Daryl but the angle was all wrong. He figured there had to be a way to get on without touching the other man. Putting his hand on the seat, too close to Daryl’s ass he trembled when tan hands grasped his pulling Joey’s arms around his waist. Daryl did that, made sure his hands slid across him.

“Come on! I don't damn bite!”

The engine was too loud to reveal his shudder but Joey squeezed Daryl’s waist and slid on, his dick so close to Daryl’s ass. If that were to really happen it would probably be in a reverse situation. He went to pull his hands back but Daryl pressed them against his stomach and revved the engine again.

“Hold on to me.”

Daryl smelled the most tantalizing scent and inhaled again realizing Joey was wearing cologne, a type that complimented him. It was just a little spicy with an underlying aroma of pine.

Joey squealed out, he was a little scared as the wind blew through his hair, they couldn’t be going fast but it felt like it. The houses weren’t passing by them too quickly. He even saw the odd wave Eric gave them from the end of his driveway. 

“You good?” 

He could hear Daryl, there were no helmets on them so it couldn’t be too bad.

“Yeah.” He huffed out and giving into desire squeezed Daryl’s waist tighter.

Daryl didn’t react and soon sped up. After riding past 3 blocks Joey was actually bummed when Daryl parked at a curb. He held his breath when Daryl pushed back against him, his back pressing into his entire chest and he clenched his fallen fists sad they weren’t around Daryl.

When Daryl hopped off he looked at Joey with his squinty eyes, they were peering down at him like he was a puzzle to solve and only when Daryl walked a step closer to him did he realize they were in front of Daryl's home.

“How did it feel?”

“Not as bad as I thought but I think you were taking it slow.”

“You're pretty smart.” Daryl licked his lips, a twinkle in his eye. 

“So sit tight.” Daryl added.

He watched Daryl walk up his steps and was puzzled by what was going on.

Daryl rubbed his eyes and shook his head, him pressed against Joey felt right. The cologne made him almost dizzy and he touched his stomach longing for Joey’s hands to be back on him.

“No one could ever want you.” He whispered and yet he went to get two helmets daring for once to be selfish even if he got nothing in return.

Joey straightened up on the bike and pushed up a little then back down. He wondered if he could actually look attractive on a bike like Daryl, he probably looked out of place. Sliding up another fraction the door swung open and he saw what would happen next.

“It’s time to speed up.”

Before Joey could say a thing a helmet was placed on his head, fingers touched the bottom of his chin and then he was looking at Daryl through tint. Daryl put his own on and even with his face now hidden he still looked good.

“Suits you Joseph.”

The soft tone of his name had him biting his lip because any reply would sound stupid. Daryl slid over the bike and they were closer than before, nothing was said and Daryl started to ride down the street still as slow as before. After a few more blocks he sped up and then they were out the gates.

He had to hold Daryl closer as the trees started to whip by faster, the bike speeding more than allowed in the old world. His finger dipped into Daryl's belly button, only a shirt in between but Daryl didn’t even slow down.

‘Oh my God his hands are on me.’ Daryl groaned out internally discovering he liked that.

Still he pushed it away and cruised along stopping at a corner store. Joey let go of him, Daryl jumped off his bike to open a mailbox and he smirked when a bottle of vodka was brought to him.

“Ain’t the best but it works.” Daryl smirked.

His adam's apple bobbed as he chugged it down and handed it to Joey who took a small sip.

“Thanks for the ride.”

“It’s nothing.” Daryl grunted.

Joey knew it was though.

“I was bullied as a kid. Grew up poor, all my parents could feed me was cheap junk food. I was fat before I knew what fat was and wearing handy downs that fit too tight and bringing little debbies to lunch got me a reputation. I was the poor fat kid. Even Negan would kind of pick on me. I was never treated as just a person you know.”

“Negan’s an ass.”

“This isn’t about him. What I guess I’m saying is even the Saviors who came to me to repair their motorcycles, they never gave me the time of day so thanks.”

The only reply he got was the bottle snatched from his hand. Daryl awkwardly pushed his hands into his pockets and they watched the trees bend with the increasing wind.

“Best get back.”

Joey jumped on behind Daryl and held him tight with no reluctance this time.  
——————————————————————-  
Carol had finally had enough of reading old cooking magazines and cleaning Rick’s house which was pretty spotless to begin with. Rick warned her that Negan had been overly mopey lately.

“Negan if you don’t get out right now I’m marching in.”

Waiting a few minutes and getting no reply she walked in and saw Negan lying in bed. 

“Get up or I’m joining you.”

Negan groaned but sat up.

“We’re making bread and that’s final.”

The only woman who ever terrified him was Carol so he waited a few seconds and walked down. 

“Sift this flour.”

Negan sat down and did so watching Carol crack eggs and measure oil.

“I think it would be more entertaining to watch Joey bumbling around Daryl than this crap.”

Carol raised an eyebrow and brought over another bowl of measured flour.

“You have your own romance to keep you intrigued.”

“So you’ve seen it then?’

In a rare show of mutual conversation Carol nodded and kept cracking eggs. 

Kneading the dough was oddly therapeutic and Negan felt calmer after a few batches. The scent of baking bread made his stomach grumble.

“I know he’s fine, I’m just a mess.”

“Being pregnant can do that. I was glad when Sophia came and I stopped crying.”

“Rick umm he told me a little about her.”

“Different life. I wish every day I still had her but I would have been a different woman if she lived. Probably dead because I was weak. Her dying and my husband, it changed me.”

Rick had mentioned Ed too and Negan didn't touch that subject.

“When my wife died I was still the same jerk as before. I only got worse during these walkers. I always got off on power.”

“But you’re not that man anymore.”

“I saw I was wrong way before I met your group but I was in too deep.”

“I wanted to hate you, still do I guess but Rick is...he’s trustworthy. Way back we wanted to leave him and only Daryl believed in him. I only stayed because of Daryl’s trust in him. He kept a secret from us, that we all had the virus and I was so angry but I see now he was trying to give us hope.”

“He tries to do that a lot.” Negan said.

“It’s not easy being him, I couldn’t lead us like he does, so far he’s proven why he holds that position. He didn't want to leave you today but staying would have been selfish.”

“Let’s finish the bread.” Negan was done talking.

Four loaves of baked bread later Negan was shocked when a thickly buttered slice of warm bread landed in front of him with a glass of milk. Carol sat beside him with a similar plate and he figured after they ate he would ask her if she wanted to go for a walk, his real plan to spy on Joey and Daryl.


	20. Sometimes the Truth is Best

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well I’m sorry to say this the temporary end of the road. Who knows when the next chapter will come.

Negan wiped his mouth and rubbed his belly watching Carol finish eating her own slice of bread. She looked so normal, could pass for timid in the moment but he knew that wasn’t damn right.

She looked at him and gave a small smile and he shivered.

‘She could gut me before I even saw it coming.’ He smiled back fakely.

At her last bite Negan stood up and groaned. “I need to take a walk, be healthy you know. Care to join me, my protector?”

Carol huffed but then shrugged her shoulders. ”Sure.”

Negan walked slowly, watching Alexandrian’s water flowers and play with their children. It brought him a calmness but he had to laugh at watching someone paint their house.

“It’s ridiculous right? Half these people would be dead if we didn’t show up.”

“You sound mighty cocky there Carol.” Negan teased. “You need to train them, with you teaching them they will learn to survive on their own.”

“Already on it.” Carol said.

Negan walked slower as he approached Joey's house, he was only two houses away.

———————————————————————-

Daryl battled the internal dilemma inside his head, it had been so long since he wanted anything from another but with Joseph’s arms around him he realized it just felt right.

He never yearned do anything sexual or romantic, masturbating was a challenge but he always knew he was bisexual and leaned towards men. Not a certain kind of man but once in a blue moon he would bump into a guy at a bar or see a model on a billboard sign and think he was attractive enough, nights after that revelation he could stroke his cock faster and feel okay with it, have a good release before unwarranted guilt ate up his insides.

More than that, Daryl wanted someone to sit with at home. To just talk about their days and hold hands, stroke fingers through each other's hair and smile at each other, enjoy one another’s company.

Joseph wasn’t gay, wasn’t hitting on him and no one would get it. Not because of how Joseph looked or that he would want a man but he was the bad guy, Joseh was more awkward than him and more importanlty he wasn’t gay.

The gates were opened and he regretted not taking a longer ride, he parked his bike and went to get off but Joseph’s arms stayed wrapped around him.

“He took his helmet off and whispered. “Joseph.”

On the ride back Joseph held on but couldn’t enjoy the ride, he caught himself imaging Daryl was gay and could want him. The way the man was acting made him suspect he wouldn't be angry if he acted on his desire. All Joey wanted was a man to understand him and it seemed Daryl did. He had never told anyone about being bullied in school and sure, Daryl didn’t react but he was a man of few words. His eyes, his actions let him know he was heard and he didn't like what Joey went through and that was enough.

Daryl parked and Joey needed to let go but he couldn’t. Daryl took off his helmet and whispered his name. Coughing, Joey let go of him despite never wanting to again.

“Sorry.” He muttered and started to get off the bike.

Daryl got off quicker and gave him a hand, he blushed and was relieved his helmet hid his face.

“Thanks for the ride Daryl.”

“Anytime.” Daryl replied and took his helmet off for him.

Joey figured it was time to go and rubbed his shoe against the driveway.

“Maybe you can help me build my new bike. I’m thinking something that’s easier to go off road and somehow more quiet.” Daryl had been wanting to build a new bike but this was him needing a plan to see Joseph again, and often. 

“I would like that.”

“We would have to work together a lot on it though, coming up with parts that work and making a list. It’s not something that will be built easily, it might take some time, some trial and errors.”

“I’m down for that.” Joey answered.

He looked into Daryl’s eyes as the man looked away, then he saw it. A leaf in Daryl’s hair. ‘I wonder how that got there with his helmet on.’

Joey walked closer and slowly reached his hand out and pulled out the leaf. Daryl wasn’t sure what the man was doing but wasn't scared.

“Leaf.” Joey explained as he dropped it.

Daryl realized he didn't flinch and he didn't want Joseph to leave. “I umm…”

He stepped closer to Joseph, their eyes connected and he couldn’t break contact if he wanted to. “You smell nice today.”

‘Loser. Who says that?’ Daryl chastised himself. Damn, no wonder he couldn't get laid...not that he wanted to right this moment. A connection was what he yearned for.

“If I’m being honest I’m not big on cologne but I thought maybe I should put some on because I like you?” Joey said shyly.

“Is that a question?” Daryl smirked.

“Not really. I just don't know how you would take that. I’m not trying to make you uncomfortable, just honestly is the best policy and you should know. I won't be offended if you don’t like me. No one really does, I’m weird. I think only Eugene would get me and he even seems a bit weird for me. I’m too smart for my own good, my momma always said. I wish I wasn’t like this.”

“Joseph.” Daryl placed his hand on his elbow.

“I should get out of your hair. We don’t have to build that bike together. I get it. I’m such a weirdo and…”

“Joseph.”

Daryl’s hand cupped his chin, his body pressed against his chest and he quieted.

“I’m not good at this either but I’m gonna kiss you now.”

Joey’s heart hammered away but he stood still, when Darly’s lips met his he opened his mouth and kissed back. He suppressed a squeal when Daryl’s tongue darted in and he let Daryl take control. It was the best kiss he ever had, only the second in his life.

Daryl pulled back too quickly, Joey feared he regretted it or that he didn’t kiss back good enough.

“I liked that but I’m not really big on intimacy, affection. It’s hard and maybe that’s something you want more of but I would really like for you to come in and drink a beer with me, maybe talk a bit.” Daryl sounded so hopeful.

“Sounds perfect Daryl. I want to get to know you and we don't have to move fast. That was never my strong suit anyway, what I desired most.”

“What’s that?” Daryl needed to know.

“To be known and understood, I want all that stuff others want but I just want someone to be with me, get me.”

Daryl smiled and he did squeal then. He had never seen Daryl smile with his teeth, it was small but sexy as fuck.

“You coming?” Daryl was already walking fast to his door.

“I wish.” Joey whispered, content enough for now.

——————————————————————

“Freakin’ knew it!” Negan fist pumped the air.

“You're too happy about this Negan.”

“Nothing is wrong with being happy when love is in the air, maybe it will be you next with Tobin.”

Carol thought he lost his mind but she laughed. 

“Maybe the curtains open.” Negan went towards Joey’s house but Carol pulled him back.

“Oh no you don't.” Carol pulled on the collar of his shirt.

They finished their walk, rarely a thing said. Once home Negan collapsed on the sofa and groaned as he tried to take his shoes off. He was shocked when Carol kneeled in front of him to help.

“I only gained twenty pounds when I had Sophia but I felt like it was one hundred, I could barely bend.”

“Does it hurt? Going into labor?”

Carol pushed his shoes aside and joined him on the couch. “It does but it’s worth it and when you see your child’s eyes you forget it all.”

“If I get that far.” Negan teared up.

“Negan.” 

“It’s just that I still can’t believe it and I’m worried, maybe my womb or whatever can’t get but so big, maybe my body will stop giving her nutrients. I wake up every morning freaking out until she kicks. It’s not natural and I worry that I can’t really give birth to her.”

“You are pregnant for a reason, I would like to believe God exists. He probably does, I don't know why the walkers are here but if he made you pregnant then there’s a reason. Your baby will be fine and you will probably be knocked up again two months later.”

“Don't push it.” Negan warned.

Carol laughed but stopped and took his hand and squeezed it. “I know it’s scarier with you being a man but Negan, what you're thinking isn’t exclusive to you. Most mothers feel the same way, get worried when their baby doesn't kick for a day or giving birth. I remember falling and I almost lost it. Short little fall and of course I got checked out, had no broken skin or bruises but I worried.”

“I guess that makes me feel better.” Negan squeezed her hand back.

“It will be rough but you will make it through okay, this baby will be healthy.”

“I don’t like Rick being out there, if something happens...”

“I’m cutting you off Negan, come on Aaron told me you like chocolate chip cookies and we’re making some.”

Two dozen chocolate chip cookies, a batch of acceptable acorn cookies, and some homemade pasta later Negan had not worried at all. He learned more about Carol and she even disclosed some minor tidbits about Daryl which made him feel even more guilty about locking the guy up and even prouder that he made the moves with Joey.

He didn’t hear the door open as he stuffed a cookie into his mouth. 

“Really Negan? Carol, you shouldn’t support his sugar addiction.”

Carol crossed her arms as Negan crashed into him, not giving a shit as he peppered Rick’s face with kisses in front of his new friend.

“I'll give you two a minute but don't give me shit Rick. He was worried about you being out there and I needed to make a batch for the neighbors.”

“Crap Carol.” Negan corrected.

Carol rolled her eyes and gathered the container of cookies to take next door.

“Oh, there's some left?” Rick joked.

“Shut up.” Negan shut him up with a kiss.

“I think it’s time we go upstairs.” Negan whispered.

Rick took his hand and let himself be led upstairs.

When Negan got them to his room he pinned Rick against the door and kissed him, he wouldn't allow himself to breath as he plunged his tongue into Rick’s mouth and grinded against him.

Rick bit his tongue causing him to step back. He was about to ask what the hell when Rick spoke first.

“What makes you think you get to do that to me huh?”

In an instant he was the one pressed to the door, his stomach flushed against wood and he groaned when Rick took both his hands and pinned them above him and grinded into him. His neck was kissed and nipped, sharp bites littered his neck and beneath his shirt and he groaned as Rick peeled his shirt off and took his hands again.

Rick was shorter than him but he felt the burn of his arms stretched and Rick’s hard dick pressing into him. He sighed at a soft caress to his stomach.

“Did you behave when I was gone?”

Negan wanted to say no, see what that got him but a deeper part of him wanted to be honest and he gasped. “I did, me and Carol went on a walk, we saw Daryl kiss Joey.”

Rick laughed. “Well that’s hard to believe.”

“Saw it with my own two eyes.”

Rick pressed against him again and licked up his ear. “How many cookies did you eat?”

Negan wasn’t sure, he thought maybe four. Cool air hit his ass when Rick yanked his jeans down then his boxers and pressed him harder against the door.

“Probably four but I’m not sure.”

Rick spanked his ass and he moaned out, pressing himself against the door for some relief. “You need to eat more fruit.”

Negan wasn’t sure if Rick was serious or wanted a reason to spank him but he leaked when Rick smacked his ass again. 

He heard snickering behind him. “You like that don’t you? I could make you cum so hard just from spanking your ass red.”

It was true but Negan wouldn't admit it. Hands came around him and rubbed at his stomach, a few tender kisses laid on his back then Rick took his hand.

He was led to the bed, Rick shoved him down on it. He dripped while Rick opened a bag and pulled out a pair of handcuffs. “I found this today, wanted to find more but I can manage.”

Negan went to lie down but was pushed up the bed and manhandled onto his back, the click of metal around his wrists made him twitch. Rick stroked up his dick, gathering his precum and pressed his fingers into his mouth.

He humped the air at Rick sucking on his fingers, shaking at a firm smack to his leg. 

“Be still.” Rick ordered.

Rick poured lube onto his fingers and breached Negan, he spread his legs as much as he could, deep prodding loosened him up, he grunted at the sharp intrusion. His hole resisted Rick’s digits at this angle but Rick just pressed in harder, depositing more lube and working him open.

Negan leaked more at that, his dick angry and red as it stayed neglected and the sting to his ass burning but he loved it. Rick would slap at his thighs just because and press in harder. At a pump to his dick he thrusted up. Rick slapped his dick, digging nails into his slit. He cried out, wondering why he leaked and breathed so shakily.

“I already told you to be still.” Rick warned.

He opened his mouth to reply but a sock was shoved into his mouth.

“Squeeze my hand if it’s too much baby. Okay?”

Leaking he looked at Rick in awe, closing his eyes at a gentle sweep to his hair. “Okay? You with me?” 

Negan nodded.

“That an okay with what we’re doing?”

Negan nodded yes again.

At that Rick pressed four fingers in, he squirmed causing him to change angles, wanting it to be difficult for his hole to spread open. Rick smirked letting Negan know he was aware of what was thinking and he whined when Rick left the bed.

There was a box at the corner, where the plugs came from. Rick cut his eyes at him days ago and told him to not look into it. Curiosity urged him to look but he liked a good surprise and Rick would get pissed, part of him wasn't sure he wanted to know how far he could really push the man.

He dripped at the sight, Rick lathering up a large dildo, one that looked like it should be shared between two girls or well him and Rick if Rick would ever go for that. It was wide but thin and Rick bit his lip slathering it before he got back on the bed.

Rick licked up the toy, sucking only the tip in and Negan groaned. The lips of his lover were wet with slick when he was kissed. Negan hissed when Rick pushed the head of the toy in, it slid in a few inches and he groaned at Rick licking up his shaft and kissing his tip, sucking on it like he did the toy. Just as quickly the toy was shoved in a few more inches and he pulled against his cuffs grunting at the sharp sting upon his flesh.

Nails ran up his shaft, he hissed at fingers prodding in with the dildo. 

“You're so tight Negan. Almost like a virgin.” Rick’s eyes glistened with mischief.

The dildo slipped in his hole deeper and he made a muffled sound against the sock in his mouth, plastic pushed and pulled out of his hole. Rick sat back and jerked himself, his own cock straining and wet, he swirled at his tip and groaned out.

Negan watched what he could over his baby bump, Rick leaned over to jiggle his balls, his finger pads sweeping up precum that he deposited on the toy. Rick pulled the toy almost completely out and folded it over pressing it back in.

Negan pulled against his cuffs, groaning as much as he could at the increased girth widening his hole, his dick weeping and he couldn't help it, he pushed back. His ass meeting Rick’s thrusts in, handcuffs digging into his wrists, making him almost cum.

Rick pressed down on the base of his dick forbidding his release and shoved the toy almost completely out then back in, working Negan’s hole open. He bent over and pulled it out, licking at Negan’s wet rim.

“Oh my God!” Negan screamed despite being muffled.

“Say what Negan? I can't hear you there.” Rick kissed his hole, licking circular around his rim, shoving his tongue in teasingly. He marveled at the small gaping hole that wouldn't close. He lapped in, depositing his spit in before pressing the toy back in, not folded this time. Negan huffed as the toy slid in further, too thin to arouse his prostate but how far it went made him leak and shiver.

Rick jerked himself, watching the toy go in and he had to do it. He slipped in it almost completely, the small rounded tip of the toy nestled inside Negan’s hole, almost out of sight.

“Your hole is the most delicious thing I’ve ever seen Negan. Never knew your ass was such a greedy little thing.”

Negan was taken aback by the filthy words but he twitched and pressed back whining when Rick yanked the dildo out. Rick knew him too well, he groaned when thick fingers breached him, crooking and rubbing at his prostate that was finally getting relief. Three fingers pressed in, a finger pad never relinquishing it’s abuse against his sweet spot and with a cry he came onto Rick’s other working hand.

Rick leaned over him kissing him as he stroked himself.

“Your ass takes whatever I give it.” Rick cooed.

Rick kissed him roughly and then he felt it, Rick’s warm release on his dick. Rick rubbed his seed in then collapsed against him.

“Don't wash it off tomorrow.”

It reminded him of the first time he and Rick fucked, fast and dirty, an order made that he refused but he would listen now. He sighed and relaxed.

He felt the burn to his shoulders at the same time he heard Rick’s soft snoring start.

“Rick!” He muffled out.

“Shit. Sorry.” Rick looked sheepish and pulled out his makeshift gag.

He closed his eyes again, Negan huffed out. “Handcuffs Rick.”

“Right.” Rick laughed and uncuffed him. “Sorry, new to this.”

It occurred to him at that moment Rick couldn't have been like this with Lori, with anyone else. He never thought about it before but now he knew.

“Maybe I ate five cookies.” Negan was officially enslaved, wanting one more smack before he went to bed.

Rick laughed and rolled him over on his side, spread his cheeks and spanked him twice. “That’s for lying.”

Rick knew him too well.

He was almost asleep when Rick scooted behind him and rubbed his red ass, Rick reminded himself to get lotion, knew Negan would enjoy that.

“It was a good run today.”

“Hmm.” Negan replied sleepily, satisfied at those last two swats that were the hardest of the night.

“I found pink paint for Jasmine and paydays for you. Your lucky day.”

Negan couldn't think but he was content.

“Our lucky day.” Rick corrected and kissed him behind the ear.

Negan didn't want Jasmine to see the misdeeds he just performed but he liked to think she was watching from up above smiling at Negan finally getting the love he begged for only in his head.

Little did he know she was watching and she knew all, she was happy for the man she always called her son.


End file.
